Relationship Psychology Discussions > My Story

No Contact

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aquarian:
its been a little over 3 months since i last talked (texted) my guy and 4 months since i last saw him. i started the no contact rule before readers even told me not to. i think guys should initiate because they're the "hunters" and i didnt want to seem clingy. and if he really cared, he should do something about it

haileyn:

--- Quote from: aquarian on February 08, 2012, 05:17:46 PM ---its been a little over 3 months since i last talked (texted) my guy and 4 months since i last saw him. i started the no contact rule before readers even told me not to. i think guys should initiate because they're the "hunters" and i didnt want to seem clingy. and if he really cared, he should do something about it

--- End quote ---

That's how I feel but now I'm getting the dreadful feeling that my ex really doesn't care bc he's not doing anything. Do you ever feel that way?

aquarian:
i felt like he didnt care even before we broke up and i told that to him when we had our break up talk. he insists that he does care, but if he does he really doesn't show it. i dont understand why he's always blowing hot and cold. one day he'll be completely loving and the next he'll be distant

Synergy:
I'm with both of you.

I do agree that the man should step forward if he wants to, BUT I keep hearing about fear and all that stuff from readers, and it just makes me wonder if at some point we have to take a stand and make the move. 

I'm definitely not talking about my situation because we weren't together long at all and it is what it is, but I really started thinking about you guys who have gone a long time without contact.  I completely understand your positions though.  It's necessary to follow your hearts and intuition.  I just wanted to make sure you weren't doing it just because advisors said not to.  Kisha keeps telling me not to initiate a conversation (Chance broke up with me via text) because he's going to contact me soon, but I want to give him a piece of my mind!!!  In the long run though, that's really only for me and not really to benefit the situation. 

wishfulthinker:

--- Quote from: Synergy on February 08, 2012, 04:36:55 PM ---Why has everyone chosen to keep from making contact??  Is it because of the "rules", because you already expressed what you were feeling to them at one point and they still walked away, or because you've been advised not to do so by readers?

I'm just curious.  :)

--- End quote ---

Wouldn't it be grand if people just said what they meant and meant what they said.  We wouldn't need to call psychics ever again. I hate all of this game playing "the rules".  Really - let's face it - guys can be dense.  Really dense.  Not all of them, and not all of the time, but....
Sometimes I ask myself, what if I knew I would never see this guy again...what if he came to me and said "Hey, by the way I'm moving to ten-buck-two".  What would I do different than I am now?  What holds us back from expressing what is really in our hearts?  Is it fear of rejection?  I don't want to be old and look back and see that I didn't take the opportunity to see what could happen.
In my reading with Cookie, she said the simpliest thing "You are not making enough eye contact with this man".  Really, that's it.  After 2 1/2 years of anguish and torment I just need to look him in the eye and swoon at him more. Lol.  See what I said about guys being dense.

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