Author Topic: Dilemma  (Read 19921 times)

elcaliente

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #15 on: September 04, 2012, 04:06:32 AM »
Exactly.  When he left he said he cherished the friendship we had, and considered me his best friend and asked if we could continue the friendship. He said you can think about it, but I said I didn't need to, and I agreed. I also agreed in an email I sent 2 days later.  Since then he has made no contact.  It's been nearly 3 months now.  I think the text showed him that I was honouring my word, and still acknowledging the friendship has had asked me to preserve. Now that I think about it, the fact that I am honouring my word and he has not, not once, but now twice, might make him feel badly.   
Well you took the high road and that's good. Now he knows you don't hate him and you can be satisfied that you made that clear.

Offline scorpiogirl

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #16 on: September 04, 2012, 04:55:51 AM »
Exactly.  When he left he said he cherished the friendship we had, and considered me his best friend and asked if we could continue the friendship. He said you can think about it, but I said I didn't need to, and I agreed. I also agreed in an email I sent 2 days later.  Since then he has made no contact.  It's been nearly 3 months now.  I think the text showed him that I was honouring my word, and still acknowledging the friendship has had asked me to preserve. Now that I think about it, the fact that I am honouring my word and he has not, not once, but now twice, might make him feel badly.   
Well you took the high road and that's good. Now he knows you don't hate him and you can be satisfied that you made that clear.

Truthfully ( and this will sound mean, sorry but I've been here) he just probably just didn't want to be the bad guy so he offered a "friendship". Irrespective of what a psychic says, the fact that he has not responded or made an effort should show you his true intention. Don't you deserve a better "friend" than that?

elcaliente

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #17 on: September 04, 2012, 01:35:08 PM »
Indeed.  At this point he isn't my friend, as he's made that quite clear in his choice to completely cut me out of his life and others, I might add.  However, I am his.  I sense that he is going through more than just a change in love interest, at this time.  And the readings do indicate that it's more like a life review - midlife crisis.  All of his actions leading up to the break up suggest that this could be what is going on.
Exactly.  When he left he said he cherished the friendship we had, and considered me his best friend and asked if we could continue the friendship. He said you can think about it, but I said I didn't need to, and I agreed. I also agreed in an email I sent 2 days later.  Since then he has made no contact.  It's been nearly 3 months now.  I think the text showed him that I was honouring my word, and still acknowledging the friendship has had asked me to preserve. Now that I think about it, the fact that I am honouring my word and he has not, not once, but now twice, might make him feel badly.   
Well you took the high road and that's good. Now he knows you don't hate him and you can be satisfied that you made that clear.

Truthfully ( and this will sound mean, sorry but I've been here) he just probably just didn't want to be the bad guy so he offered a "friendship". Irrespective of what a psychic says, the fact that he has not responded or made an effort should show you his true intention. Don't you deserve a better "friend" than that?

elcaliente

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #18 on: September 04, 2012, 02:07:36 PM »
I'd just like to add to my last post.  I've been told in all my readings that my ex and I share a deep connection regardless of the distance between us.  I'm not sure if that something you all get in your readings, but it certainly has been in all of mine.  I've also been told that one way psychics can tell if there is potential in a relationship is to measure the connection.  If there is little energy in a connection, chances are it is not going to manifest in a good outcome.  I've also been told (whether it is true or not, I cannot verify) that psychics can also tell if a relationship between two people is one that involves emotional feelings or not, and that is assessed through the energy of the connection. So, in the case of third parties, if a person shows up in a reading but there is little energy in the connection, the psychic indicates that it is not an attachment that involves emotion.  It could be a purely physical interest, or a casual interest.

Of course, it is possible that two people can share love for each other as friends, and so a deep connection doesn't necessarily mean a romance.  But, if it is true, and if I consider the absence of a response to my friendly text as a demonstration that my significant other has no interest in pursuing friendship with me, then what is the deep connection between us that is being seen in the readings?

If the above is true, a

Offline scorpiogirl

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #19 on: September 04, 2012, 03:11:09 PM »
I don't always want to sound like I'm being tough on anyone so all I will say is if you read back on other people's posts (even mine from when I joined this board and wrote of the crazy psychic addiction I used to have a few years ago because I was heartbroken) you will see that everyone has been told they have a strong connection. Then look at how many people got the person back.

It's not an easy thing to work through and I think many psychic readings keep people tied to someone emotionally when the connection is long gone. I was in that position where I called for reassurance and even though the facts showed otherwise I believed in the stories I was fed.

Even now I will have a general reading about things, job, family etc and I will always be told that whoever I'm dating at the time is who I'm going to marry. I've been told the guy is in love with me even though we haven't known each other too long. So I look at how he treats me and not what a psychic says and what I cannot confirm. If they;d been right, I would have been married about 5 or 6 years ago.

Offline Synergy

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #20 on: September 04, 2012, 03:16:23 PM »
I completely agree with scorpiogirl. I heard all the same statements for multiple men. I don't want to diminish your pain or minimize the strength of your connection, but there comes a point when you have to accept reality and actions at face value.

Offline SomethingBetter

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #21 on: September 04, 2012, 03:19:33 PM »
I have gotten the same as well, most have here. I am sure it's true for some and an outright lie for others, anything is possible.

But actions do speak louder and I think it's always best to feel like you are the rule and not the exception, because most of these psychics will try and make you feel like its the other way around. Sometimes it is, most often it isn't.

Good luck :)

Offline Luckystar

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #22 on: September 04, 2012, 04:25:56 PM »
Quote
Upon learning that I sent the text and received no reply, three advisors said it was because he is not ready.  One advisor said he is contemplating what to say, to represent his feelings without them being construed by me as a lie.  Two advisors said he is thinking about what to say, and an answer will come soon. One advisor said that the absence of a reply is telling in that it shows he still has feelings, because if he had no feelings, he wouldn't have had to think much about how to reply, and it would have been easy to just send a quick, "thank you, you too".  I see that reasoning, I guess, but I also don't rule out the possibility that either he didn't believe it warranted a reply or that he was trying to show me that I am not important to him.All of the advisors said he was thinking about me now.

Please let us know if he does reply. I would love to know. It always seems like psychics start making up things when they get something wrong, so it will be interesting if he replies to you at some point and those particular psychics were right.

When i was going through the situation with my "sm" a couple of years ago, i had sooooo many different psychics tell me why he was with the girl he was dating at the time and why he couldn't be with me. So many of them gave me timeframes of him returning which passed and then that lead to my dissapointment. Now i want to share a part of my story with you guys because i consider myself lucky in that my guy did in fact return.

The girl my sm was dating a couple of years ago lives in Canada and they dated while we were in college. Prior to entering the relationship with the girl we both felt a connection and i had talked to him about the future and i could tell he was getting scared (I think we were around 22). Well he kept telling me he wasn't ready to settle down and i don't think i listened and partly blame myself for him cutting off contact with me and dating that girl instead. Anyways, the story is too long to type here, but fast forward a few years later and he just ADMITTED to me that he wasn't ready for a "final committment" and that was part of the reason he ran. The problem i am having here is
1) Forgiveness (he hasn't really proven himself to me and i don't know if he would do that again) and
 2) WHY should i wait for when HE is ready? (he goes back and forth with wanting to be in a relationship and not wanting to be) >>>>Uhh no.

So a few months ago when we were hanging out, he basically said he wants to be financially stable before getting serious. I told him i was seeing someone, and wanted to continue dating this guy if he didn't want an actual committment. So here we are again, i am currently dating someone else (and the guy is amazing), and the sm texts me almost every night.

BTW, the only psychics who have gotten this situation down correctly (or for the majority of the time) were:
Eden (CP)-specifically gave a personality description of the new guy in my life and told me i would have to make a choice by the end of summer
My two local readers- gave different details
Aries Intuition (Keen)-she specifically knew my ex would be around when i started dating this other guy, knew the new guy just started his own business, and also has predicted that i will have to make a choice

It should also be noted that while Jean off of CP only worked for me in some of her readings, she did say that the tables would turn (now i am dating someone and he is not).

Offline SomethingBetter

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #23 on: September 04, 2012, 05:01:16 PM »
I am glad you posted that Luckystar. I have one year down waiting for him to be ready and probably another year or two. And I have decided I am done waiting. It's not fair for anyone to wait while another gets their life together. I know this man loves me, but I could be missing someone amazing in the meantime. We all could be.

U am actually going to be closing my Keen account shortly, and I will give a more final tally shortly.

loops77

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #24 on: September 04, 2012, 05:22:54 PM »
Quote
Upon learning that I sent the text and received no reply, three advisors said it was because he is not ready.  One advisor said he is contemplating what to say, to represent his feelings without them being construed by me as a lie.  Two advisors said he is thinking about what to say, and an answer will come soon. One advisor said that the absence of a reply is telling in that it shows he still has feelings, because if he had no feelings, he wouldn't have had to think much about how to reply, and it would have been easy to just send a quick, "thank you, you too".  I see that reasoning, I guess, but I also don't rule out the possibility that either he didn't believe it warranted a reply or that he was trying to show me that I am not important to him.All of the advisors said he was thinking about me now.

Please let us know if he does reply. I would love to know. It always seems like psychics start making up things when they get something wrong, so it will be interesting if he replies to you at some point and those particular psychics were right.

When i was going through the situation with my "sm" a couple of years ago, i had sooooo many different psychics tell me why he was with the girl he was dating at the time and why he couldn't be with me. So many of them gave me timeframes of him returning which passed and then that lead to my dissapointment. Now i want to share a part of my story with you guys because i consider myself lucky in that my guy did in fact return.

The girl my sm was dating a couple of years ago lives in Canada and they dated while we were in college. Prior to entering the relationship with the girl we both felt a connection and i had talked to him about the future and i could tell he was getting scared (I think we were around 22). Well he kept telling me he wasn't ready to settle down and i don't think i listened and partly blame myself for him cutting off contact with me and dating that girl instead. Anyways, the story is too long to type here, but fast forward a few years later and he just ADMITTED to me that he wasn't ready for a "final committment" and that was part of the reason he ran. The problem i am having here is
1) Forgiveness (he hasn't really proven himself to me and i don't know if he would do that again) and
 2) WHY should i wait for when HE is ready? (he goes back and forth with wanting to be in a relationship and not wanting to be) >>>>Uhh no.

So a few months ago when we were hanging out, he basically said he wants to be financially stable before getting serious. I told him i was seeing someone, and wanted to continue dating this guy if he didn't want an actual committment. So here we are again, i am currently dating someone else (and the guy is amazing), and the sm texts me almost every night.

BTW, the only psychics who have gotten this situation down correctly (or for the majority of the time) were:
Eden (CP)-specifically gave a personality description of the new guy in my life and told me i would have to make a choice by the end of summer
My two local readers- gave different details
Aries Intuition (Keen)-she specifically knew my ex would be around when i started dating this other guy, knew the new guy just started his own business, and also has predicted that i will have to make a choice

It should also be noted that while Jean off of CP only worked for me in some of her readings, she did say that the tables would turn (now i am dating someone and he is not).

Why do you have to make a choice so quickly? why not keep dating the guy to see if you actually want to be with him..or he with you? Will you automatically loose all your dating/romantic options forever?Keep your ex on the sidelines or out of your life where he always wanted to be anyway and make him prove his worth.

I dont always understand why readers say "You have to make a choice". I just think that this is an easy thing to say. The old guy never made a choice, and he is still sniffing around years later. Why not just see how things play out before committing to anyone or anything? Especially if you are just dating the new guy.

Just thinking out loud...
« Last Edit: September 04, 2012, 05:25:27 PM by loops77 »

Offline Luckystar

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #25 on: September 04, 2012, 05:33:37 PM »
Exactly SB. People stay sad if they keep waiting for someone to change or make a move.

and loops >>
Quote
  Why do you have to make a choice so quickly? why not keep dating the guy to see if you actually want to be with him..or he with you? Will you automatically loose all your dating/romantic options forever?Keep your ex on the sidelines or out of your life where he always wanted to be anyway and make him prove his worth.

That IS what i am doing. Notice how i said he hasn't proven his worth? And i am happy dating the current guy. I never make choices quickly especially not a choice like that. However, Kisha did say i would eventually have to.

loops77

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #26 on: September 04, 2012, 05:36:33 PM »
But what if you don't, is what I'm asking. Will both guys vanish forever?

Offline Luckystar

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #27 on: September 04, 2012, 05:37:39 PM »
I have no idea what is going to happen. I will keep you posted.

Furah2fun

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #28 on: September 04, 2012, 05:39:23 PM »
@Luckystar,

  I am in a similar situation. Since October 2010 (the first break up), have been in a back and forth situation because the sm can't get his life in order (unemployed, not financially stable etc., not where he wanted to be at this point in his life...the list is endless.). The psychics were all correct regarding contact, and we would get back together for a few months, then break up cause he still couldn't figure his life out. He himself would talk about the future with me repeatedly, meeting my parents, marriage etc.  So I kept going along with it, because it seemed that the psychics were all right, and they kept telling me i am impatient, which may be true, but this is ridiciliuous. I should have started dating someone else a long time ago.

 It all started up again last August because Alison of CP convinced me to reach out and said that he would respond within 2 hours, which he did. I wonder what would have happened had I not done anything. Then even after what I thought was the closure conversation in February, he wouldn't leave me alone.  One particular time I was having health issues, and he showed up to my house and wanted to take me to the hospital (this is after we hadn't seen each other in five months, alison predicted this as well, by the way.) So it was very confusing to say the least.  I know he cares immensely but I can't wait for the rest of my life! Currently, we are not talking. I hope if he returns he is ready to move forward, otherwise this is a waste of my time.

 
 

tjoy12

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Re: Dilemma
« Reply #29 on: September 04, 2012, 07:11:02 PM »
Hey guys!

Good to hear these stories - I think these stories personally help sometimes even more than the readings...because guess what - I can validate that the info provided is real, not what a reader says.

Anyway,
I created my own prediction. I know...I'm crazy!

Background. It has been 3 months since my ex broke up with me. For one month, i hung around as the "friend" - the next month, I cut contact - the following month I opened the door to friendship again. He immediately ran right through that door and contacted me then the following week, invited me out, then I did not hear from him in 2 weeks till this past weekend after I met up with his sis for drinks. After that meeting, he called a few hours later.

Note: Since opening the door to friendship, all communication and hanging out has been strictly platonic. No intimacy or talk of intimacy.

Anyway, many and I mean many readers have seen engagement and marriage with this guy. They all say he is coming back including:

Kisha
Sincerity
Abundant Visions (Gaylene)
Cookie
Venus (CP)
Sapphire21
Yvonne (CP)
Ciarra (CP)
Lady Persephone

I'm mentioning who I read with recently and the most popular. I of course read with more at CP, but learned most are not good.

Anyway, I'm learning to step back and see things for what they really are. From what I can see, yes, my ex responds to my messages if I text (rare), yes, he calls me (not all the time), I would like to think if he was done his sis wouldn't have met with me...etc...but still: I'm at the point that if I cannot validate something right now...then it is NOT valid.

I believe he has all the signs he needs to move forward if he wanted to:

1. I opened the door to friendship
2. I accept his calls
3. I went out with him
4. I met with his sis

My prediction: If I don't see any extra effort by mid Sep, I predict that I will slowly wean off of friendship with him... i.e. waiting a couple days to call back, etc...

I'm also going based off of what I was told too by:

LadyP
Kisha

That the contact initially will not be consistent at first, but will build up this month.
It's just that I have to step in and make decisions for myself too and not rely on readings solely which I feel like maybe I was doing.
I don't want to find myself in a cycle of calling and calling and things continuing to get pushed out further. I'm taking a stand to give him and myself a timeline and will then act based upon the progression or lack thereof - without calling readers.