I've been lurking on this forum for a few months after I found it on the complaints board. Like all of you (or at least the posts I've read), I became addicted when I became involved with T and things started to go south. My addiction started in November, 2010. I don't even want to think about what I've spent, but I probably could have taken a few really nice vacations!
At least that way I would have had some great memories!!
I normally use CP but in the beginning I tried a few others. I just like the CP readers better. I've read with most of the popular ones. Some I really like and others I just don't feel a connection with.
It's funny but T and I started dating and about 2 months into what I thought was a great relationship, he just vanished off the planet! No call, no text, nothing. So the calling began. I was told countless times we'd be together again, he was afraid, he didn't like how much he "felt" for me, etc. Oddly enough, we did get back together again but only on a friendship level. Then he "freaked out" again. Started calling CP and was told he'd be back. And yep, it happened again and we got involved as more than friends. Then in November, we split again!! So frustrating. But I reached for the phone...again. I am being told STILL that we will be together again. There is another person involved -- they've been together for 8 years on and off. We originally met during one of their "off" periods. The first time we split, he did get back together with her and has been all this time we were seeing each other. No, I'm not proud, but there was just -- a VERY strong connection! I unfortunately fell in love with him. When you love someone, it is truly hard to want anything but to be with that person. He always said he wasn't happy in his relationship with the other person but he also didn't want to be the "bad guy"....he wanted her to see that they weren't right for each other. He and I went on vacation in Sept 2011 and had a wonderful time. When we got back, "they" got into a huge fight (she had no idea he went with me) and he thought she was finally going to leave. Well...she didn't. I was exhausted from having to hide my true feelings from him, and honestly, from myself. I was exhausted from riding the fence of trying to be his friend and lover at the same time. It hurt like hell! I wanted the whole piece of cake, not just the crumbs. So in November I told him I couldn't keep it up, I adored him, I didn't want to be the "other woman". In mid December, he sent me an email saying he didn't want a relationship on any level, told me not to call, text, stop at his house. I sent him a Merry Christmas text, no response. I then sent him a text in mid January just saying I hoped he was doing well and that I also hoped we could, some day, be friends again. No response.
Then I had a reading last week (local person who is very accurate for me) and she told me he was going to get pulled over for driving a bit erratically because he will be involved in an argument in his car. He will have had a few drinks, so the stop will cause bigger problems for him. I sent him a text just warning him (he knew about Ann) to be careful. He actually replied to my text thanking me and saying a few other things. I replied and he replied back again. And that was it. Since November, I've made so many calls to CP and everyone has told me we will be back together, that they will finally break up and that he is basically missing me. I finally stopped calling in early January but then of course, after the exchange of text messages this past Friday, I called twice this weekend. Same story -- he'll be back, don't contact him, let him miss you, he loves you but is afraid.
It's so frustrating when you get timelines that don't work out...or when they tell you that someone loves you but yet that someone doesn't communicate! It just gets your hopes up. I keep going back to the fact that the two other times, I was told we'd be back together and we were both times. I still believe in my gut and in my heart that it's not over, but it's so hard to keep believing.
Just wanted to post and say hello to all of you in the same boat!!! I can totally emphathize with SO many of you!! It's just heartbreaking!
