No man worth your time is worth all of this heartache

[XeroLove]

My ex and I broke up in February. It was one of the hardest things I’ve gone through in my entire life (or so I thought). I moved to a new state in hopes of a fresh start, but all it did was make me miss him more. One day I was reading my horoscope and I saw a listing for an online psychic at the bottom of the page. Early the next morning I decided to give it a try and I used 4-5 psychics within an hour. I was instantly hooked. From then on I would use my entire paycheck on Keen. I did this for about two months until I finally decided enough was enough and that I was going to contact my ex.

So I did it. I texted him. To my surprise he responded within ten minutes and I was not blocked. I couldn’t believe it. I had plans to visit my hometown a month after we started talking again and I told him. He told me he wanted to sleep with me when I came to visit. That should’ve been my first sign, but I was so excited to have that feeling again that I thought it was the best thing in the world.

I visited him a month later and we had an amazing time, or so I thought. I think I was so infatuated with the thought of having him again that any attention I received from him made me feel like he loved me and wanted me. Boy was I wrong. After our visit decided to move back to my hometown because I felt happy when I visited. I missed my home for so long and especially the person in it who made me feel so good.

I moved back up within a couple of weeks and we decided to hang out again. Long story short he didn’t want me how I thought he did and it made me go crazy and lose my sh*t. I hadn’t acted like that since the last time I had saw him. It wasn’t clear at the time, but it’s clear now that he truly brought out the worst in me.

If you don’t get anything from this, at least realize that someone who truly loves you will not make you wait and worry. They will not be out of contact for months if their true intention in the end is to be with you. They would be in your life. Why waste your time and money on them? I am not bashing psychics, because maybe they’re right about outcomes, but it may not be the fairytale you picture in your head. More psychics told me I would have him back then not. They were right, I had him back, but no where near how I wanted it to be and not for very long.

I promise you, it get better. Let go. Enjoy life. Someone will come along and make you feel that feeling again. It’s not gone forever. When you least expect it, someone will amaze you and you’ll be able to cherish them more than you’ve ever cherished anyone and they will feel it. I guarantee it

[njlady]

If you don’t get anything from this, at least realize that someone who truly loves you will not make you wait and worry. They will not be out of contact for months if their true intention in the end is to be with you. They would be in your life. Why waste your time and money on them?

I promise you, it get better. Let go. Enjoy life. Someone will come along and make you feel that feeling again. It’s not gone forever. When you least expect it, someone will amaze you and you’ll be able to cherish them more than you’ve ever cherished anyone and they will feel it. I guarantee it

That is exactly right.

[psychic girls]

So True I wish I really should I seen this forum sooner. 

[sawthelight]

If you don’t get anything from this, at least realize that someone who truly loves you will not make you wait and worry. They will not be out of contact for months if their true intention in the end is to be with you. They would be in your life. Why waste your time and money on them?

I promise you, it get better. Let go. Enjoy life. Someone will come along and make you feel that feeling again. It’s not gone forever. When you least expect it, someone will amaze you and you’ll be able to cherish them more than you’ve ever cherished anyone and they will feel it. I guarantee it

That is exactly right.

Second this, exactly right.  I think the reason why i went though such a depression after the first POI I was calling about was the fact that aside from all the money I wasted on readings about him, I really realized that someone that TRULY cares and wants to be in your life, won't put you through all this BS.  Won't leave you filled with anxiety and uncertainty.  Won't disappear for long periods of time with no contact.  Unless they have a really good reason on ghosting you, there is no excuse!  anyone can take a few minutes out of their day to shoot a text and say hello, how are you, you still alive?  LOL.  Think about it, if they really wanted to be with you, would they disappear and take a chance that you might meet someone new?  It doesn't make sense.  I dated a guy in my 20s like this, total self centered jerk who would reappear and disappear at his leisure.  I never got readings on him, but guaranteed if I did, they would have told me that he would come around and commit, etc....HUGE jerk and waste of my time.

Of course no relationship is perfect but anyone who puts you through the wringer will all those toxic emotions is not worth your time, and we all deserve better. 

I think the life lesson I learned though him was to respect myself more. 

[Luckystar]

If you don’t get anything from this, at least realize that someone who truly loves you will not make you wait and worry. They will not be out of contact for months if their true intention in the end is to be with you. They would be in your life. Why waste your time and money on them?

I promise you, it get better. Let go. Enjoy life. Someone will come along and make you feel that feeling again. It’s not gone forever. When you least expect it, someone will amaze you and you’ll be able to cherish them more than you’ve ever cherished anyone and they will feel it. I guarantee it

That is exactly right.

Sound advice.

[sunshineluv7]

That's why as I said in a recent post, this is never a guy issue, this is an ANXIETY problem.

Everyone knows no man is worth "this".

[Natashanyc]

That's why as I said in a recent post, this is never a guy issue, this is an ANXIETY problem.

Everyone knows no man is worth "this".

I agree

[PrettyLittleLiz]

That's why as I said in a recent post, this is never a guy issue, this is an ANXIETY problem.

Everyone knows no man is worth "this".

I can't agree with this more. Once I realized I had an ANXIETY issue, not a guy issue, I stopped calling so much. Of course the connection with this POI wasn't working out but my anxiety had me compulsively calling or hanging on to predictions - so I worked on the core anxiety issue and have been a lot better. I also let go of the person who obviously had no interest in being a partner.

I saw a good meme today: "I hope you understand in 2018 that your time is valuable and in the name of self love, stop associating with people who don't reciprocate your efforts".

[psychic girls]

Agree with everything you said. Poi ghosting you, let it go you can find someone better. Instead we wasted so much money on psychics to see what will happen and how they felt about us which we can never validate that it true or not. Reading with psychics it truly a way to be in denial and to get you high and thinking how great it going to be, like the psychics said.

[icloud9]

Agree with everything you said. Poi ghosting you, let it go you can find someone better. Instead we wasted so much money on psychics to see what will happen and how they felt about us which we can never validate that it true or not. Reading with psychics it truly a way to be in denial and to get you high and thinking how great it going to be, like the psychics said.

I agree lol Readings can be detrimental to our "moving on" process. But....Was there any psychic that was ever right for you, @Psychic Girls ?? ever???

[psychic girls]

Agree with everything you said. Poi ghosting you, let it go you can find someone better. Instead we wasted so much money on psychics to see what will happen and how they felt about us which we can never validate that it true or not. Reading with psychics it truly a way to be in denial and to get you high and thinking how great it going to be, like the psychics said.

I agree lol Readings can be detrimental to our "moving on" process. But....Was there any psychic that was ever right for you, @Psychic Girls ?? ever???

Nope I don’t think psychics ability eixists.

[Miss Philosopher]

I agree with a lot said here. I did want to add though that in some cases, the poi or ex will not ghost, but remain in somewhat consistent contact, maybe not daily, but weekly or something like that, after they've done you dirty and supposedly moved on to "start their new life". One has to ask themselves why that is. What's the motive. It can be because they really do want to remain friends and feel the two of you do better that way. However, more often than not, there is a self serving motive there and they will keep contact simply to keep you on a back burner as a fall back option without you really even realizing it.

This is just to say that, just because someone keeps in contact with you doesn't mean they really care and want to be a part of your life. I see a lot of people on here that say "If they really want to be with you then they wouldn't go without contact for long periods of time". Them remaining in constant contact can actually make it harder and be more of an emotional roller coaster and not be for the reason's one would hope for. In my opinion, contact doesn't even matter. It's what is their behavior toward you, what are they SHOWING you. Are they putting in any kind of efforts that are satisfactory for YOU.

And yeah, if you find yourself dealing with someone that makes you feel anxious and/or emotionally upset or traumatized.........most of want to figure out the reason why and that's why we call these psychics, when really we should probably be running for the hills and maybe someday we'll figure out the reason why and maybe we won't but at least we'll have our sanity and dignity in tact. lol

That's just my 2.5 cents.

[sawthelight]

I agree with a lot said here. I did want to add though that in some cases, the poi or ex will not ghost, but remain in somewhat consistent contact, maybe not daily, but weekly or something like that, after they've done you dirty and supposedly moved on to "start their new life". One has to ask themselves why that is. What's the motive. It can be because they really do want to remain friends and feel the two of you do better that way. However, more often than not, there is a self serving motive there and they will keep contact simply to keep you on a back burner as a fall back option without you really even realizing it.

This is just to say that, just because someone keeps in contact with you doesn't mean they really care and want to be a part of your life. I see a lot of people on here that say "If they really want to be with you then they wouldn't go without contact for long periods of time". Them remaining in constant contact can actually make it harder and be more of an emotional roller coaster and not be for the reason's one would hope for. In my opinion, contact doesn't even matter. It's what is their behavior toward you, what are they SHOWING you. Are they putting in any kind of efforts that are satisfactory for YOU.

And yeah, if you find yourself dealing with someone that makes you feel anxious and/or emotionally upset or traumatized.........most of want to figure out the reason why and that's why we call these psychics, when really we should probably be running for the hills and maybe someday we'll figure out the reason why and maybe we won't but at least we'll have our sanity and dignity in tact. lol

That's just my 2.5 cents.

Great post.  I can so relate...

I agree keeping even in limited contact with some of these POIs can really mess with you more.  that's why I cut off all contact with first guy, hearing from him sporadically was just making it harder to move on.  It would get my hopes up.

[Miss Philosopher]

I agree with a lot said here. I did want to add though that in some cases, the poi or ex will not ghost, but remain in somewhat consistent contact, maybe not daily, but weekly or something like that, after they've done you dirty and supposedly moved on to "start their new life". One has to ask themselves why that is. What's the motive. It can be because they really do want to remain friends and feel the two of you do better that way. However, more often than not, there is a self serving motive there and they will keep contact simply to keep you on a back burner as a fall back option without you really even realizing it.

This is just to say that, just because someone keeps in contact with you doesn't mean they really care and want to be a part of your life. I see a lot of people on here that say "If they really want to be with you then they wouldn't go without contact for long periods of time". Them remaining in constant contact can actually make it harder and be more of an emotional roller coaster and not be for the reason's one would hope for. In my opinion, contact doesn't even matter. It's what is their behavior toward you, what are they SHOWING you. Are they putting in any kind of efforts that are satisfactory for YOU.

And yeah, if you find yourself dealing with someone that makes you feel anxious and/or emotionally upset or traumatized.........most of want to figure out the reason why and that's why we call these psychics, when really we should probably be running for the hills and maybe someday we'll figure out the reason why and maybe we won't but at least we'll have our sanity and dignity in tact. lol

That's just my 2.5 cents.

Great post.  I can so relate...

I agree keeping even in limited contact with some of these POIs can really mess with you more.  that's why I cut off all contact with first guy, hearing from him sporadically was just making it harder to move on.  It would get my hopes up.

Totally agree. Each contact we receive is like, ok have they come to their senses? Is one of these contacts going to eventually be them wanting to reconcile? Why are they contacting me? It MUST be because they still care. That's what it was doing to me. But, now, even though I still receive daily contact and yeah I'm getting the hints and sweet words and the wanting to half ass reconcile on his terms.........I put no thought into the contact being received. I just look at it like it's whatever and don't even expect to keep receiving it. It gets tiring and a lot of times I WISH he would have ghosted me and just didn't contact for an extended period of time. That way, that creates enough space for true healing to occur and then who cares if contact is made and when it is made.........again you're not really bothered by it and aren't interested anymore.

[sawthelight]

I agree with a lot said here. I did want to add though that in some cases, the poi or ex will not ghost, but remain in somewhat consistent contact, maybe not daily, but weekly or something like that, after they've done you dirty and supposedly moved on to "start their new life". One has to ask themselves why that is. What's the motive. It can be because they really do want to remain friends and feel the two of you do better that way. However, more often than not, there is a self serving motive there and they will keep contact simply to keep you on a back burner as a fall back option without you really even realizing it.

This is just to say that, just because someone keeps in contact with you doesn't mean they really care and want to be a part of your life. I see a lot of people on here that say "If they really want to be with you then they wouldn't go without contact for long periods of time". Them remaining in constant contact can actually make it harder and be more of an emotional roller coaster and not be for the reason's one would hope for. In my opinion, contact doesn't even matter. It's what is their behavior toward you, what are they SHOWING you. Are they putting in any kind of efforts that are satisfactory for YOU.

And yeah, if you find yourself dealing with someone that makes you feel anxious and/or emotionally upset or traumatized.........most of want to figure out the reason why and that's why we call these psychics, when really we should probably be running for the hills and maybe someday we'll figure out the reason why and maybe we won't but at least we'll have our sanity and dignity in tact. lol

That's just my 2.5 cents.

Great post.  I can so relate...

I agree keeping even in limited contact with some of these POIs can really mess with you more.  that's why I cut off all contact with first guy, hearing from him sporadically was just making it harder to move on.  It would get my hopes up.

Totally agree. Each contact we receive is like, ok have they come to their senses? Is one of these contacts going to eventually be them wanting to reconcile? Why are they contacting me? It MUST be because they still care. That's what it was doing to me. But, now, even though I still receive daily contact and yeah I'm getting the hints and sweet words and the wanting to half ass reconcile on his terms.........I put no thought into the contact being received. I just look at it like it's whatever and don't even expect to keep receiving it. It gets tiring and a lot of times I WISH he would have ghosted me and just didn't contact for an extended period of time. That way, that creates enough space for true healing to occur and then who cares if contact is made and when it is made.........again you're not really bothered by it and aren't interested anymore.

So true. that's why when some POIs come back, they are no longer POIs, because we are no longer interested.

I personally have no time or sympathy for inconsistent men.  You want to come back, show me something, that you're serious, or GTFO of my life.  Literally, have no patience for it.  Such a turn off.

Never let someone be in your life on their terms.  It's setting the whole pattern of the relationship to be on their terms..and you deserve more.

I would personally just ask the guy, listen, this is what I want, this is what I'm looking for.  See how they reply.  It sounds like this guy has been in your life long enough for you to set some boundaries.  If it scares him away, F him. 

Sorry, if that sounds harsh but I see so many great women sell themselves short for these guys.  So not worth it.