Relationship Psychology Discussions > The Vent

How long have you guys been “waiting”?

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Realrealwater:
.

devangk3:
If they want you in your life they will make an effort. Simple.

Realrealwater:

--- Quote from: devangk3 on May 06, 2020, 09:50:29 PM ---If they want you in your life they will make an effort. Simple.

--- End quote ---

I agree. I dunno if I feel it’s this simple though. I believe people can let their pride& fear of rejection get in the way. I know I’ve done this before as in withold contact out of stubbornness& pride.

devangk3:
Stubbornness and Pride for sure are two main reasons but remember they chose to be stubborn and prideful over you, you  may very well go ahead and initiate contact but they will always think after that they have the upper hand and you will always have to bow down even if they are wrong

I had been in this situation and done that...if I am wrong i will come forward and initiate contact but if someone is just testing limits then let them wait for the rest of their lives...I will never initiate contact

Hope this helps and focus on yourself

russianred:

--- Quote from: Realrealwater on May 06, 2020, 09:45:22 PM ---No. He ignored my attempts a couple days after the break up but he did tell me he’d get my things to me. However, its been almost 5 months& nothing lol I was told not to reach by every single psychic & also that he is going through very tough times so I never let it get to me as I can see that he hasn’t been very active on SM & he is usually front & centre.
However, yes it does hurt& it doesn’t take months to return my stuff.
I’ve getting to a point mow where I don’t need readings but reality is hitting me& I’ve gone into a state of real depression cos I was not really dealing with my pain.
My thing was that we were good together, things did not need to be the way they are & I’m very anti ex. I could see us being friends even amongst all of this as we just understood each other.
But I feel like at the end of the day yes, I need to heal. Just don’t know where to start. Sometimes I’ll think I’m fine then suddenly I’m dragged back into this black hole. It’s messed up

--- End quote ---

I feel like a theme of these boards are stories of women being told not to reach out to the guy, and I honestly think that some of it is motivated by readers wanting to keep us dependent.  I think there are some situations where the guy has to be the one to come forward, but this doesn't sound like one of them to me.  I don't see what you would have to lose from a "can we talk about things?"-type text or call.  Yeah, maybe it's "better" if POI comes forward but it's also better to have some peace of mind and possible insight from POI himself rather than the readers.

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