Relationship Psychology Discussions > The Vent

Readers say to wait for POI to make contact but should I?

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Penelope:
 Intuition and gut feelings aside, has anyone initiated contact with POI in spite of psychic advice not to and to wait for them to initiate contact?  How did it work out for you?

Love2lovenj:
I did but their reason for me waiting was so that he would learn that i wouldn't chase him.  This is my thought on this if they give you predictions and you do something that was advise not to it will change their prediction.   On the same token i did one time reach out and he was receptive but i did it at the time to let him know that i was open to talking.  After that initial contact i no longer initiated.

Dreamer23:
I initiated contact even when they told me not to. I learned over the years to trust my intuition and if I have a gut feeling that I should reach out, then I will. It hasn't changed the outcome at all. In fact, it may have moved things in the direction that I wanted them to go.

But I think you every situation is different. So it really depends on the dynamic between you and the POI. I think most psychics tell not to initiate contact because that is most likely to make a person reach out if they don't hear from you. But that is not always the case. Every situation is different.

I'd say take what a psychic says and then check in with your own intuition.

Fidget1028:
I think many tell you not to reach out because you will have your answer and won't rely on psychics anymore. I know. I'm cynical.

Dreamer23:
Personally I don't like dating advice from youtube. It's horrible, IMO. It basically tells you to play games.

If you want to reach out, reach out. See how POI reacts. If they don't respond, if they tell you to cool off, then you have your answer. At least for now, reaching out is not a good idea. That can always change.

I believe it's important to state your needs at some point without being demanding, but showing what it is that you want.

And sometimes being consistent, showing interest, can turn into a positive. I think it all depends on the situation.

But I would stay away from dating books, videos, programs...I think they are a bunch of crap.

I read the book Attached and that made a lot of sense to me. It's written by a psychologist.

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