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Lacking closure

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sunandmoon:
The reason I started calling psychics was because my ex backed away, after being attached to my hip for 3.5 years. There was no real warning. Oh sure there were little things I can see in hindsight, but considering some of the issues we had during the r/s and overcame, they were nothing.

Not ONE psychic could ever tell me why he left. As much as we say they are good at past and current, not ONE could say "wow, he left because he felt/you did/etc". Sure, they made guesses. Especially if I told them some of the story. But *I* can make guesses, my T can make guesses, his mom can, anyone with half a brain can take a guess. Fear of commitment, I hurt him, he wanted more than he felt I was giving - I've heard and thought it all. No one really knows what went on in my ex's head but him and he isn't talking, not to me anyway. As a matter of fact I have not heard from him in almost 3 months now.

That and the eternal "is he coming back and when" were the only things I ever wanted to know. No one could answer the first and I've had so much bs shoveled at me in the past 18 mos about the second that I don't believe any of it anymore.

This part of my life has been more bizarre than my childhood of catholic school. People set him up with a married woman - while we were living together (and she is still married) and now she stalks me. I've become closer to people in his family than I ever was (and can see some of the similarities in all of them). I can predict things happening in his mom's r/s because I've lived them with her son. You can't make this up.

I've been patient, I've made really positive changes to myself and my life, I know I did nothing to this man to cause him to treat me the way he has in the past 9 months (the first 9 mos post-breakup weren't too bad). How someone goes from "I love you, I miss you, I want to make it better" 9 months after breakup to nothing is beyond me.

I've attracted a wonderful man into my life now and we've had almost 2 glorious months together. I am still so cautious but I really was tired of being sad and alone and wondering when things would turn around with my ex. I got tired of seeing signs where there were none and reading into each little nuance of him talking to me, or liking something on FB.

Ironically enough early this summer he posted on his unused Twitter account that "it's never too late". Someday he may find out how untrue that really is. I have no doubt he will contact me some day. But until then I am enjoying my life.

Sorry for the negativity but this still bugs me a lot and I'm overworked at the moment so there you have it lol. I'm really frustrated that I spent 18 months and thousands of dollars hoping for a reconciliation, and the only things that have come true have been some points of contact. I couldn't even get closure on what the hell I did to this guy to make him turn his back on me, and I would have settled for that.

positivethoughts2:
sunandmoon - I hate to ask this, but do you mind sharing with us the list of psychics who you felt gave you false hope? If you already posted this my apologies. Congrats on the new guy - what wonderful news  :)

sunandmoon:
I have not given a complete list and will be happy to do so but it will mostly have to wait till next week.

The bottom line though is that 95% of them gave me false hope. There are a handful that gave me timelines of next spring (a few said this last year too, Gina Rose was one of them). But every single other one just kept pushing timelines out and even when I started to mention the new guy they would steer me away from him.

Here are a few from a year ago:
Abrielle: first reading, said we'd be in this process till April 2011. He would spend from October - Feb getting close and pulling back (which he sort of did). March/April love back on track - he didn't talk to me at all during that time frame.  I called her again the end of last october and she said we'd be back on track Feb/Mar 2011

Michelle: 11/1/10 - said there was no one else involved with him (there was at the time). There would be a huge change in him the 2nd week of November - there wasn't. Dec/Jan we'd build on our foundation and we'd have a great 2011. Not even close.

Talked to her again 11/24/10 said we'd be together in January, all obstacles would be gone. Now, he did invite me to an event NYD, we had a great time, and then he stopped talking to me again. He was also still in a r/s that I knew nothing about.

Winter: (not sure if this was HP or CP) Nov 29, 2010 - told me that it may be 4-6 months before he figured things out. It's been 11 now.

Verbena: 12/2/10 (I really like her) She gave me some good contact timelines but her big prediction was that he'd make an offer of a permanent r/s between Feb 2 - Feb 20 - didn't talk to me at all during that time, in another r/s. She also said he will not come close to being settled till the end of this month and he may be rocky till 2013 but we'd be together early in 2011 so as long as I could manage that.......

Talked to her again Dec 9 and she felt we'd make tremendous progress in 1-1.5 mos. Besides NYD there was nothing.

Gina Rose: 12/24/10 - said this wouldn't get better for 12-18 mos so that may still come true... but will I care at that point? By mid-summer 2011 I'd see a huge improvement in him - (well he did wave to me when I saw him out in July).  She promised me that if I ignored him and shut him out, he would reach out to me... I have not contacted him since Aug 22 nor has he contacted me......

Alison: 12/3/10 - she got contact timelines right for last December but said we'd be back in a r/s June 2011.
Talked to her again 1/6/11 - again she got a contact right but said we'd be in a r/s in March and more solid in June. He talked to me a few times in June, nothing in March ("forgot" my bday)

Giselle: 12/31/10 - my higher self said to continue working on myself, he had more work to do... this would go on another 3 months

This is just the tip of the iceberg of who I called...... I called a lot on Keen and Hollywood as well.

If I look at my spring calls the notes will all say resumed r/s in the summer, and the summer calls say Sept/Oct. There is a definite pattern that I can see now that I've been calling for over a year. Fact is I haven't heard from him since August (and *I* initiated that) and he's thinking of moving now.

Anyway, they did serve a (very expensive) purpose in my life but the things I wanted to know, I never got to (why and when would he be back).

I went into this new r/s knowing I wouldn't just ditch this guy if the ex comes back. That is not me. If something happens to us, it will be because we are not working out, not because my ex decided to pull his head out of his ass after all this time. It would be one thing if I was casually dating but this is more serious on both our sides. I really enjoy being with him, it feels so good to share my day with someone again and wow, he enjoys and wants to spend time with me.

I know I needed to go through some of this pain to grow as a person. Just wish I hadn't spent so much money in the process. I've never been addicted to anything in my life besides sweets lol but this was truly an addiction!

Back to work..... I'll try next week to get my old spreadsheet in here for you guys.  :)

If you have questions about specific psychics let me know, I may have read with them.  :-/

Starrlite:
Sunandmoon

Good for you for moving on.  I'm in the process of attempting the same.  Not in a relationship yet but dating.  When I started calling psychics I used keen a lot too.  Thought I found some good ones and nothing all just false hope. Spent so much money.  I would never really recommend keen. 

positivethoughts2:
thanks sunandmoon!! I really appreciate your story. If you read with Nina, would love to hear about it.

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