Relationship Psychology Discussions > My Story
I'm starting over
DreamLoveBelieve:
I haven't posted in a very very long time, but I wanted to write to tell you "Good for you!!" I was you about 2 years ago. I was in a relationship with a guy who always did what he wanted on his timeline and I sat there justifying every bit of it. After a rocky break-up period where I clung to every little text or eye-contact from afar thinking and hoping that he would wake up one day and realize how much he wanted to be with me, I reached the point where I let it go. I didn't care as much anymore because I had lost myself. I didn't even recognize the desperate woman I had become and that kicked me in the face real hard!! I started making myself be active and involved with my friends. And as unbelievable as it sounds, I met a guy who bent over backwards to make me realize how amazing he thinks I am. He built me up so high and I'm proud to say that I am a million times more confident in the woman that I am that I can't believe I wasted so much time with someone who made me feel less. I will never say that I regret having gone through that experience because I learned so much about myself, but I can tell you that you have to put yourself first and be the woman you are proud to be. Others will see your confidence and flock to be in your presence!! Keep your head up Angel!!
(In case anyone is wondering how my new relationship is going, we just got engaged and will be married next May!! ;))
--- Quote from: Angelsaboveus on June 27, 2014, 04:28:55 AM ---I have been wanting to post and tell my story here for quite some time. Since i am (as of TODAY) not getting any more readings I guess I can tell my entire story with no regrets. I want to add that it is because of all you beautiful people I can even start to tell it as I have read your stories and felt your pain.
I was originally on these boards as Angel-light. Many of the old timers may remember me. At that time I was breaking up with my bf and waiting around, as we all were, for contact. I have to say, many readers were correct in telling me he would contact me and we would be together and for me, that is all I had t to know. I usually never read more than 6 months out so I had success with many readers. As we all know the smaller contact predictions often come true. Anyway, we did wind up getting back together but I would not call it a relationship. In fact, during that time, I was so distraught because I knew he was chatting and texting with other women. Of all the advisors I read with, only a few mentioned this: Uli (said he was being sneaky with his phone) Queeen of cups, and Cookie. But I kept being encouraged to continue the relationship as it were and be patient (how many times have we all heard this?)
Over the last year I have had so so many readings it would make your head spin. One would go into the next and into the next. I pretended that since I was only calling a couple times a week it was ok, but the truth is that it made me a different person. It made me give him the upper hand because they were always saying how much he really loved me (words I never heard from him) and that he was "almost ready". I will say that I called a few regularly, and some of them would tell me, even with a "good" reading, that I did need to keep my options open and that there was a man who was going to be THE ONE if I let him go. Of course I couldnt do that because I had no self-confidence in my own gut anymore.
The crap finally hit the fan last week, a week ago today, when he said he wanted time to "figure out what he wanted" and needed space for the weekend. That was 1 week ago today. I have had many advisors who say he will be back and want a relationship (yawn) and of course i called for almost a week straight. I spent all last weekend in bed crying and wondering what he was doing. To my credit, I had a mere 10 readings during that period (not bad for a binge eh?) but too many for me. What I realized was that I was holding myself back waiting for this guy to make up his mind about being in a relationship with me. I mean, who the HELL does he think he is? To make ME wait? I am one GREAT woman!!!!! I only starting questioning myself when I started calling advisors.
Now I will say that many of them did say to kick him to the curb - more than I would care to admit. They would say this after saying :I can see he loves you - who would listen to anything after that? I have had a lot of great advice and actually been able to really see where this guy is coming from in a way I wouldn't without their insight. Because I never asked for the "ultimate outcome" I had many accurate readings which kept me going. And if I had a negative reading, I would try a new advisor and get an entirely new waiting period - and so on and so on. You see how they cycle works?
Today, after a week of crying and beating myself up for not hearing from him I realized that I am through the hard part. I am actually further along in getting over him than I realized, and this made me so confident - I looked at myself and said hey I am one bad ass bitch! I FINALLY see that I don't have to wait for him to decide anything - I can choose to live my life right here, right now. So I started making plans. I bought tickets for concerts that I would have waited to do in case he came back. I planned a trip over the 4th of July weekend, the weekend I had tried to get him to commit spending with me. I have a gf coming in to town to spend the weekend - and this was all just in a few days! My point is that I am living for me, regardless of some reading or wanting him to show up again. I know damn good and well he isn;t waiting for me to make his plans and now neither am I and damn it feels good!
Tonight I met a couple girls out and while I was sitting there, I thought of him. And I wondered what he was doing. ANd then I thought about me apart form him...not all tied up together as I had been accustomed. And a beautiful thought popped into my head - now read carefully: I was exited for possibility. I was actually excited about the unknown!!! It was a revolutionary thought - you mean I dont have to try know EVERYTHING before it happens? WOWZA!!! And this immediate PEACE came over me - I knew I would be ok. I knew that, in time, I would meet someone else. I knew that my life would begin anew. I knew I would miss him and cry and be jelly when I saw him with someone else, and you know what - I will be OK when it happens. I may not be perfect and I may want to call again and know all the answers but that's ok. All I have to know right now is that I will be ok. I will be fine, I went through the hardest effen part last weekend and what could be harder than that? Ok lots of things but at least I know I survived and you can too. You don't have to know tomorrow or next years. Life is meant to be a roller coaster and God bless that it is.
Thank you all for sharing your story. It has helped me tremendously in gaining perspective and strength - you all are so brave for sharing!
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Angelsaboveus:
Thank you so much for that Dream. You don't know how much I needed to hear that today. Yesterday I went online to a dating site called Plenty of Fish. I have an old account there and they send me emails each week with potential matches. SO since I hadn't heard from him in 11 days I thought - well I well look this time. Mind you, I hadn't been on since we were together and the only reason I didn't cancel the account was because they make it so confusing, so I just hid my profile and forgot about it.
Low and behold - there is his profile "Looking for a relationship". He put another town down so I think he thought he wouldn't come up in any searches. What a prick!! It said he had been on just 2 days before - and I can see where he updated it because the status said "divorced" and he has just signed his papers last month. But the real kicker? He put up a pic of himself where I was in it but had cropped me out.....And all this time every reader (most) had said he is missing you, I don't see any other women around him, not one said he was on dating sites. This sealed the deal for me now. I will never ever ever go back. I am so devastated and pissed. All this time he said "it's not you it's me". And it was me that he didn't want to be with.
Cookie was one of the only ones who told me he was on dating sites, but I haven't read with her in a month and she said it didn't look like he was active. Well it looked active to me.
I can't believe I fell for his lies and the readers who told me he loved me (except for Magical Sandra - told me he was not in love) and Maureen who told me he wasn't the one for me. I am stunned and saddened. I now have to move on and heal. And the funny thing is I don't want to even have a reading about it now. I can't hear it anymore it just hurts so damn bad.
Dream I am so so happy for you!! I hope it happens for me too someday, and thank you for your words.
bstalling:
--- Quote from: DreamLoveBelieve on June 30, 2014, 08:18:36 PM ---I haven't posted in a very very long time, but I wanted to write to tell you "Good for you!!" I was you about 2 years ago. I was in a relationship with a guy who always did what he wanted on his timeline and I sat there justifying every bit of it. After a rocky break-up period where I clung to every little text or eye-contact from afar thinking and hoping that he would wake up one day and realize how much he wanted to be with me, I reached the point where I let it go. I didn't care as much anymore because I had lost myself. I didn't even recognize the desperate woman I had become and that kicked me in the face real hard!! I started making myself be active and involved with my friends. And as unbelievable as it sounds, I met a guy who bent over backwards to make me realize how amazing he thinks I am. He built me up so high and I'm proud to say that I am a million times more confident in the woman that I am that I can't believe I wasted so much time with someone who made me feel less. I will never say that I regret having gone through that experience because I learned so much about myself, but I can tell you that you have to put yourself first and be the woman you are proud to be. Others will see your confidence and flock to be in your presence!! Keep your head up Angel!!
(In case anyone is wondering how my new relationship is going, we just got engaged and will be married next May!! ;))
--- Quote from: Angelsaboveus on June 27, 2014, 04:28:55 AM ---I have been wanting to post and tell my story here for quite some time. Since i am (as of TODAY) not getting any more readings I guess I can tell my entire story with no regrets. I want to add that it is because of all you beautiful people I can even start to tell it as I have read your stories and felt your pain.
I was originally on these boards as Angel-light. Many of the old timers may remember me. At that time I was breaking up with my bf and waiting around, as we all were, for contact. I have to say, many readers were correct in telling me he would contact me and we would be together and for me, that is all I had t to know. I usually never read more than 6 months out so I had success with many readers. As we all know the smaller contact predictions often come true. Anyway, we did wind up getting back together but I would not call it a relationship. In fact, during that time, I was so distraught because I knew he was chatting and texting with other women. Of all the advisors I read with, only a few mentioned this: Uli (said he was being sneaky with his phone) Queeen of cups, and Cookie. But I kept being encouraged to continue the relationship as it were and be patient (how many times have we all heard this?)
Over the last year I have had so so many readings it would make your head spin. One would go into the next and into the next. I pretended that since I was only calling a couple times a week it was ok, but the truth is that it made me a different person. It made me give him the upper hand because they were always saying how much he really loved me (words I never heard from him) and that he was "almost ready". I will say that I called a few regularly, and some of them would tell me, even with a "good" reading, that I did need to keep my options open and that there was a man who was going to be THE ONE if I let him go. Of course I couldnt do that because I had no self-confidence in my own gut anymore.
Congrats to you! Did any reader every predict your fiance?
The crap finally hit the fan last week, a week ago today, when he said he wanted time to "figure out what he wanted" and needed space for the weekend. That was 1 week ago today. I have had many advisors who say he will be back and want a relationship (yawn) and of course i called for almost a week straight. I spent all last weekend in bed crying and wondering what he was doing. To my credit, I had a mere 10 readings during that period (not bad for a binge eh?) but too many for me. What I realized was that I was holding myself back waiting for this guy to make up his mind about being in a relationship with me. I mean, who the HELL does he think he is? To make ME wait? I am one GREAT woman!!!!! I only starting questioning myself when I started calling advisors.
Now I will say that many of them did say to kick him to the curb - more than I would care to admit. They would say this after saying :I can see he loves you - who would listen to anything after that? I have had a lot of great advice and actually been able to really see where this guy is coming from in a way I wouldn't without their insight. Because I never asked for the "ultimate outcome" I had many accurate readings which kept me going. And if I had a negative reading, I would try a new advisor and get an entirely new waiting period - and so on and so on. You see how they cycle works?
Today, after a week of crying and beating myself up for not hearing from him I realized that I am through the hard part. I am actually further along in getting over him than I realized, and this made me so confident - I looked at myself and said hey I am one bad ass bitch! I FINALLY see that I don't have to wait for him to decide anything - I can choose to live my life right here, right now. So I started making plans. I bought tickets for concerts that I would have waited to do in case he came back. I planned a trip over the 4th of July weekend, the weekend I had tried to get him to commit spending with me. I have a gf coming in to town to spend the weekend - and this was all just in a few days! My point is that I am living for me, regardless of some reading or wanting him to show up again. I know damn good and well he isn;t waiting for me to make his plans and now neither am I and damn it feels good!
Tonight I met a couple girls out and while I was sitting there, I thought of him. And I wondered what he was doing. ANd then I thought about me apart form him...not all tied up together as I had been accustomed. And a beautiful thought popped into my head - now read carefully: I was exited for possibility. I was actually excited about the unknown!!! It was a revolutionary thought - you mean I dont have to try know EVERYTHING before it happens? WOWZA!!! And this immediate PEACE came over me - I knew I would be ok. I knew that, in time, I would meet someone else. I knew that my life would begin anew. I knew I would miss him and cry and be jelly when I saw him with someone else, and you know what - I will be OK when it happens. I may not be perfect and I may want to call again and know all the answers but that's ok. All I have to know right now is that I will be ok. I will be fine, I went through the hardest effen part last weekend and what could be harder than that? Ok lots of things but at least I know I survived and you can too. You don't have to know tomorrow or next years. Life is meant to be a roller coaster and God bless that it is.
Thank you all for sharing your story. It has helped me tremendously in gaining perspective and strength - you all are so brave for sharing!
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sagitira:
Dream - you don't know how much i appreciate you coming back and tell this story. after being so down your story made me smile and thank you for that. it's amazing you gave me so much strength and hope now and i made a huge step..
anglesaboveus- i feel totally same. i am sure we are both going through same..i cancelled my all accounts, i'm proud to say that, i deleted ALL MY READINGS..and all my recordings i had and everything related to psychics. mind you guys - everyone was wrong! every single one of them...totally wrong...what transpired now past 2 weeks nobody picked it up and i'm done...so outcome the way it is now - nobody saw coming...waste of my time ever ever to call and feed the addiction and hope inside me. biggest mistake i've ever done.
and also i'm tired of hearing about how he loves me, hearing about him anymore. i just wanna heal and this time it's real deal.
truth is you can honestly see even from dream's story that if a guy loves you he WILL DO EVERYTHING in his power to be around you and make sure that you know it. you will know that he wants you...if you don't know if a guy loves you then there is something wrong..why do you think a psychic who doesn't know you or him will be able to tell you if he loves you??? if you don't know then it is because:
1. he likes you but doesn't want to commit or wants to keep you just in case he can't get anything better
2. he has a gf/wife or sees others and you are one of many or you are good ego boost
3. he is getting something out of it - money/ego boost/support
there are many other reasons but important thing is that if you dont' know and have to call psychics then really the guy is not worth it...i'm talking from my own experience.
there's no point for me to even update you guys on my predictions = none happened and nobody was correct. out of hundreds of them - NOBODY...so there it is..i'm finally free from this bs...won't be returning but wish you all good luck and all the best. hope we all find the right man who will love us and make us happy, not making us cry :)
bstalling:
DreamLoveBelieve, did any psychic accurately predict your fiance?
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