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Ways to heal
Cfisher:
The comic relief is really helpful for me as well. I downloaded a bunch of Chris Rock, Eddie Murphy and Russell Peters (he's my fav! I've seen him live and he's amazing) he slams every culture out there fair and square! Ha ha! He's totally worth watching!
I too have looked into some hypnosis stuff and NLP with Richard bandler. I figure at this point anything and everything I can get my hands on is helpful!
--- Quote from: scorpiogirl on October 04, 2012, 11:23:14 PM ---
--- Quote from: obenimdunyam on October 04, 2012, 09:32:22 PM ---I wish I could take my precious reer end to the gym ;) never thought of going to the gym as a way to cope with what I am going through. Actually not a surprise the lazy person I am ;). So I started to listen to this hypnosis recording every night at bed, which is about ending a relationship. I am not saying it is working because I usually fall asleep in the first 3 minutes ;) but at least it is something that I am trying to do for myself ;)
--- End quote ---
I think you'd be surprised what you take in in your sleep. Even that moment in between sleep and awake, I sometimes feel like i have the most clarity.
Music also is a great tool for me. I don't listen to anything sad but I sing at the top of my lungs to my ipod or to youtube. I think my neighbours hate me because my voice is terrible :-)
But I read once that nobody can feel sad or down when they're singing. That's very true.
My other go-to is comedy. I love stand up or old comedy favourites. I have NOT watched The Vow or ... what is it ... the Lucky One or Lucky One.
I'm not sad anymore about that person but I know if I were to watch one of those movies or rehash The NOtebook, I would be worse off.
--- End quote ---
Cfisher:
Tjoy-you are inspirational to me for your strength. Knowing that you deserve better and that you'll find it, well, it gives me some hope!
As for me? I had it pointed out that when I started on this site I was a bit more gregarious than now and that my posts have dimmed a bit. This wasn't a negative thing that was pointed out as its the complete truth.
I've decided to close out all hopes from the last one I was involved with. So now I'm in that healing process. Hence the blah coming out of me! It's tough to make a decision to walk away from someone you want, but the truth is, having contact with him was just making me feel terrible. A total roller coaster ride.
I have to take it one step and day at a time. But I'm feeling better every day. And things will continue to get better every day. Soon I'll be back to my old self and my energy levels will get back to normal. I hate that it's forced at this point, but me going through this process right now is better than the alternative of being stuck in the muck! Right?!??
Screw that shit. I'm done with the bullshit of waiting for things to change with him, which realistically won't happen in the near future.
Shmeh. Life. Ya gotta love how life throws the most messed up people into your pathway. Well, forget it. I won't be having it anymore. I dug myself into a hole and now I'm digging myself out of it. Clearly, I like dirt? Lol! Which reminds me, I need to have a shower now... Ok, maybe I am back to my dorky self. Lol
--- Quote from: tjoy12 on October 05, 2012, 09:31:25 AM ---Cfisher - Seriously!! You're welcome! I know - It's like I hit a gold mine with that site.
I'm on there almost every day reading the articles and comments...It has honestly kept me at a place of strength constantly reminding me of what I've been dealing with.
I don't think my guy is exactly like some of those that are described, but he has displayed elements of said behavior and if his behavior hurt me - which it did - then that is enough!
It brings me back down to reality!
I am just sooooo glad that I made the decision I made and I'm not settling for less! Because he went there with marriage, measly contact attempts now are like breadcrumbs to me. He better come correct with a whole "loaf" to even get me to talk right now!
Haha - sorry, but just an example of how that site has really empowered me and helped me to realize I deserve better.
So glad it has helped you and others! ;)
--- End quote ---
tjoy12:
Aww...thanks hun! :)
Yea, I know what you mean about having contact with them. It does make it difficult and you find yourself holding on and clinging to that. I think it really hit me when I realized how dare this man go from marriage to friend?? overnight??
It doesn't make sense and is complete disrespect to me. Oh and also that he didn't apologize. huh?
Yea not acceptable.
It was a huge step for me to walk away and was not advisable from Kisha and Sapphire...but to be honest. I feel better now than how I would have felt if I was still in contact with him. I've officially started healing and we really do need that time away from them.
Maybe one day we can be friends, but not right now. It's a blow to my self respect to allow someone to stay in my life when he did what he did.
It's like, "oh ok, sure you broke my heart, but here, you deserve my friendship because you are just that great of a chap."
Nope - Wrong!
It is so hard to do right by you sometimes and sometimes, the best decision is what our mind and logic says than what our heart is screaming at the moment...but in the end, you will have your self respect and that my friend is nothing that man can take from you!
scorpiogirl:
--- Quote from: Cfisher on October 05, 2012, 09:46:14 AM ---The comic relief is really helpful for me as well. I downloaded a bunch of Chris Rock, Eddie Murphy and Russell Peters (he's my fav! I've seen him live and he's amazing) he slams every culture out there fair and square! Ha ha! He's totally worth watching!
I too have looked into some hypnosis stuff and NLP with Richard bandler. I figure at this point anything and everything I can get my hands on is helpful!
--- Quote from: scorpiogirl on October 04, 2012, 11:23:14 PM ---
--- Quote from: obenimdunyam on October 04, 2012, 09:32:22 PM ---I wish I could take my precious reer end to the gym ;) never thought of going to the gym as a way to cope with what I am going through. Actually not a surprise the lazy person I am ;). So I started to listen to this hypnosis recording every night at bed, which is about ending a relationship. I am not saying it is working because I usually fall asleep in the first 3 minutes ;) but at least it is something that I am trying to do for myself ;)
--- End quote ---
I think you'd be surprised what you take in in your sleep. Even that moment in between sleep and awake, I sometimes feel like i have the most clarity.
Music also is a great tool for me. I don't listen to anything sad but I sing at the top of my lungs to my ipod or to youtube. I think my neighbours hate me because my voice is terrible :-)
But I read once that nobody can feel sad or down when they're singing. That's very true.
My other go-to is comedy. I love stand up or old comedy favourites. I have NOT watched The Vow or ... what is it ... the Lucky One or Lucky One.
I'm not sad anymore about that person but I know if I were to watch one of those movies or rehash The NOtebook, I would be worse off.
--- End quote ---
--- End quote ---
All my favourites! I love Russell Peters. I can watch Chris Rock all the time too haha. My favourite line to say to my brother (when he expects a pat on the back for something unremarkable) is "what? you want a cookie?" I crack myself up all the time time. He is less amused ;D
oben:
@cfisher: I am listening to Steve g jones. On amazon they are 99 cents to listen to with amazon player! 8)
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