Ever been someone else’s POI?

[icloud9]

I had dinner with my ex yesterday (we’re friends now. Well.. he is, to me. I have Friend zoned him and he still wants more..) and in the middle of our conversation he tells me he got a tarot reading from this local psychic.  This made me chuckle right away because he is not typically the type of person to engage in such things. He said he was curious because he knows that  I was always interested in occultism and spiritual stuff.  Oh it’s not like he went on these  psychic hotline’s by the way.  (LOL imagine!) He said he was just returning from dinner with his friends and happened to walk by a bookstore that offered readings. (You know-one of those $25 for 15 min reading type of deal.)
Anyways, I couldn’t believe what he said. Apparently this lady told him that there was someone from his past whose description  perfectly fits me  ( physical attributes and personality) and our history together and she told him that we would end up together. He was joking about it because he is still not sold on this whole psychic stuff and views as a little silly,  but he was definitely  serious about the message  and said,  “ you see? I won’t give up on us. even cards  show that we are destined to be together.”
Omg.  And I told him stop being ridiculous and I keep reminding him that I have someone else that I wanna start my life with . Although we sort of laughed it off this seriously alarmed me.

I would love  to know you guys’ opinions on this...
This is why  i’m a little skeptical about tarot readings because I feel like they tend to read our own desires and hopes and fears.

[psychic girls]

Don't know how you American does it when we broke up with someone we don't become friends with them we don't even wanted to see them, If you even see them again it will bring so much pain.

[star1]

Don't know how you American does it when we broke up with someone we don't become friends with them we don't even wanted to see them, If you even see them again it will bring so much pain.

Yeah. I've never been able to keep friends with exes, mind you all of my relationships have been toxic so far. It's not just an American thing, I have friends who are friends with exes and I'm British.

[ladya]

Don't know how you American does it when we broke up with someone we don't become friends with them we don't even wanted to see them, If you even see them again it will bring so much pain.

Yeah. I've never been able to keep friends with exes, mind you all of my relationships have been toxic so far. It's not just an American thing, I have friends who are friends with exes and I'm British.

I can stay friends with exes after I've gotten over them not during the getting over period. I think its also cause I jive with men better. I'd never go resurrecting a friendship with anyone else, usually, once people are cut out they're just dead to me. I wouldn't even give them a second glance if I saw them in the street lol. But people I'm romantically involved with are the closest people to me and actually see a side others don't. we always have a really strong friendship bond so its a thing I miss most when things go south.

[ladya]

I can stay friends with exes after I've gotten over them not during the getting over period. I think its also cause I jive with men better. I'd never go resurrecting a friendship with anyone else, usually, once people are cut out they're just dead to me. I wouldn't even give them a second glance if I saw them in the street lol. But people I'm romantically involved with are the closest people to me and actually see a side others don't. we always have a really strong friendship bond so its a thing I miss most when things go south.

I'm pretty much the same way. My exes have been some of my closest friends and I really regret losing that if things don't work out romantically. Once I'm over losing the romantic and sexual aspect of it I'm good with being friends. I find it's more often the men who can't deal with it, it hurts their ego to feel that someone who once desired them isn't interested anymore.

Once I cut someone off though I'm done. I can forgive a lot, if a person tries to reconcile with me before I reach that point, and I extend that window pretty exhaustively for people I'm close to. But I'm more likely to cut someone off because they have incompatible views rather than because they hurt me. I value the bond more when we have similar views and beliefs, and I guess that's why I am able to compartmentalize my romantic feelings apart from friendship.

SAME!! I also value similar views and beliefs. It's very easy for me to cut someone off when we don't share this in common. I am very firm in my beliefs and values and I don't like when others put their beliefs on me or try to change my thinking. I am open to what others think and feel but I rather find someone who thinks the same way I do because I know that will cause major problems down the line. I don't believe in changing others or who they are. I agree with its usually the guys who can't deal with it. I had an ex I was very close with and I wanted to be friends but he always tried to push it to more and It just got uncomfortable where I had to cut him off (mind you he was with someone else at the time) and I don't want to be that person nor was I romantically or sexually attracted to him anymore. I do miss the friendship we had. We went through a lot together. He was my best friend and helped me in ways people even blood-related never did. For me, friendship is so important in a relationship.

[ladya]

I can stay friends with exes after I've gotten over them not during the getting over period. I think its also cause I jive with men better. I'd never go resurrecting a friendship with anyone else, usually, once people are cut out they're just dead to me. I wouldn't even give them a second glance if I saw them in the street lol. But people I'm romantically involved with are the closest people to me and actually see a side others don't. we always have a really strong friendship bond so its a thing I miss most when things go south.

I'm pretty much the same way. My exes have been some of my closest friends and I really regret losing that if things don't work out romantically. Once I'm over losing the romantic and sexual aspect of it I'm good with being friends. I find it's more often the men who can't deal with it, it hurts their ego to feel that someone who once desired them isn't interested anymore.

Once I cut someone off though I'm done. I can forgive a lot, if a person tries to reconcile with me before I reach that point, and I extend that window pretty exhaustively for people I'm close to. But I'm more likely to cut someone off because they have incompatible views rather than because they hurt me. I value the bond more when we have similar views and beliefs, and I guess that's why I am able to compartmentalize my romantic feelings apart from friendship.

SAME!! I also value similar views and beliefs. It's very easy for me to cut someone off when we don't share this in common. I am very firm in my beliefs and values and I don't like when others put their beliefs on me or try to change my thinking. I am open to what others think and feel but I rather find someone who thinks the same way I do because I know that will cause major problems down the line. I don't believe in changing others or who they are. I agree with its usually the guys who can't deal with it. I had an ex I was very close with and I wanted to be friends but he always tried to push it to more and It just got uncomfortable where I had to cut him off (mind you he was with someone else at the time) and I don't want to be that person nor was I romantically or sexually attracted to him anymore. I do miss the friendship we had. We went through a lot together. He was my best friend and helped me in ways people even blood-related never did. For me, friendship is so important in a relationship.

I can so relate to this! I have one ex I will always stay friends with because we went through so much together that no one else even knows about. And we think more alike than anyone else I have ever met. We have a bond no one else could match. But, I think it only works as a friendship because we are distant from each other. He would always go back to the physical attraction when I wasn't into that anymore.

I can still be accepting of people who have really different views and even find common ground with them, but it often ends up being a problem later. I find other people don't put that much emphasis on it and they mistake my acceptance for agreement. And many times people try to use the emotional bond to change what you think. So I prefer to keep my distance or cut things off early if I see a significant difference. I should have done that with my ex who I called about - that was my mistake and I really learned my lesson. We had similar views on some things, but opposite views in the things that were more important.

i had that issue with a previous ex as well looking back. A lot of things we just didn't have in common and it was ok in the beginning but towards the end made me kinda grow resentment. Lesson learned. My gut said don't in the beginning lol but did anyways. I don't regret it because i grew a lot but def showed me what i don't want next time around.

[jhuskindle]

Remind him ending up together could be after two marriages three children and a girlfriend for him, so not to put his life on hold waiting.

[aquagirl]

Many years ago when the internet was in its infancy,  an old childhood friend and I reconnected on classmates website.  I didn’t know he had been in love with me all these years. Anyway he told me that some psychic told him we’d end up together and even did a magic spell ensure this would happen. Needless to say free will prevailed lol  he ended up stalking me and I had to block him on all social media years later.  All along he kept saying we were destined to be together ugh.  Now this is a person I never dated nor did I ever consider nor was I ever attracted to them. 

[jhuskindle]

Many years ago when the internet was in its infancy,  an old childhood friend and I reconnected on classmates website.  I didn’t know he had been in love with me all these years. Anyway he told me that some psychic told him we’d end up together and even did a magic spell ensure this would happen. Needless to say free will prevailed lol  he ended up stalking me and I had to block him on all social media years later.  All along he kept saying we were destined to be together ugh.  Now this is a person I never dated nor did I ever consider nor was I ever attracted to them.

Good lord! That’s a nightmare. Not gunna lie I’ve had clients that I read for that may be like the boy in this setting, I usually guide them to look for new love but who knows if they will listen to me or another, unless they update me, I don’t,

[psychic girls]

Many years ago when the internet was in its infancy,  an old childhood friend and I reconnected on classmates website.  I didn’t know he had been in love with me all these years. Anyway he told me that some psychic told him we’d end up together and even did a magic spell ensure this would happen. Needless to say free will prevailed lol  he ended up stalking me and I had to block him on all social media years later.  All along he kept saying we were destined to be together ugh.  Now this is a person I never dated nor did I ever consider nor was I ever attracted to them.

This is why psychics can mess you up in the head. They must have said to him that you have deep feeling for him and is scared and afraid. They also said she is your twin flame and you are a runner.
We can’t judge them because we are doing the same thing too. Most of the time our poi is not even into us anymore and they put stuff in our head to make us act like that.

[icloud9]

Many years ago when the internet was in its infancy,  an old childhood friend and I reconnected on classmates website.  I didn’t know he had been in love with me all these years. Anyway he told me that some psychic told him we’d end up together and even did a magic spell ensure this would happen. Needless to say free will prevailed lol  he ended up stalking me and I had to block him on all social media years later.  All along he kept saying we were destined to be together ugh.  Now this is a person I never dated nor did I ever consider nor was I ever attracted to them.

YIKES!!
that is exactly the concern I am addressing in this thread.....
This psychic told my ex that we would end up together. There is no way in he*l that is going to happen. I can verify that.
This is my ex-fiance. We went through a lot together. But he cheated on me---Twice.
I honestly mentally checked out after his second affair. So I called off the wedding. So I would say I just got disgusted I fell out of love for him because of the loss of trust.
However, given the fact that we have so much history together and we are friends from high school.. I can't just DROP him. We were friends first for over a decade (on and off) before we got into a relationship.
SO, yes I still love him as a friend, that's why I am able to still spend time with him just as a friend.
But this is what I was saying ....
These tarot readings....Most of the time I think they're unreliable :l  I guess not just tarot either but psychic readings, MOST of them have been fairy tales for me.
I am going to see what happens with my current situation and continue to use my three GO-TO's. Things have been happening slowly but surely, as the readings have indicated. They have been accurate so far. However, if this doesnt work out, i am done with psychic readings for good lol.

[star1]

Many years ago when the internet was in its infancy,  an old childhood friend and I reconnected on classmates website.  I didn’t know he had been in love with me all these years. Anyway he told me that some psychic told him we’d end up together and even did a magic spell ensure this would happen. Needless to say free will prevailed lol  he ended up stalking me and I had to block him on all social media years later.  All along he kept saying we were destined to be together ugh.  Now this is a person I never dated nor did I ever consider nor was I ever attracted to them.

I don't think that this is necessarily free will, but I know from your previous posts you are a huge believer in free will. It could also be destined that you two would never be together and you'd never change your mind on him, yet he saw a fraudster "honey she loves you" reader. Needless to say, I bet you ran for the hills, lol. Jeez, he sounds a scary needy one..

[aquagirl]

I am a big believer in freewill, but i also believe certain things we are fated/destined to do, as per our life contracts. We are meant to meet certain people, have certain experiences., etc....    Because i had no desire to be with him, no "magic spell" could make me be with him, hence it couldn't manipulate my freewill.  But in all honesty wth do we all know? Maybe we have zero free will and we re playing out parts written in a book eons ago.  Or is it partially written and we fill in the blanks? All we can do is speculate. But then what is the point of living things out if it's all prewritten?  I know I've had many de ja vus that were from dreams months before, am i remembering this life already lived? am i glimpsing into the future? I guess we just aren't meant to know. 

As far as I recall, she never told him i was in love with him,  this was in early 2000 no one was talking about twin flames then. That idea was among my spiritual circles and only became popularized by the internet. i have very different views on TF stuff.  What she said was that he was destined to be with a woman from his past that he loved very much. She did say that he'd be helping me during my split, and that this is where our "love" would grow and bloom.  the helping part was accurate, and that was told to him before we reunited. But then for all i know he was making it up and full of shit, because he knew i believed in this spiritual stuff.  But then again so did he. His beliefs i found out later on were on the darker side of things.

And i did run for the hills, seriously ,  lol  it was quite scary,  Ive had a few stalkers in my time, not very fun.

[jhuskindle]

I have too, and I'm not particularly good looking or rather not conventional. I shaved my head, still happens. I started to feel maybe it's because I don't judge men so they feel at home with me?  I did think the hair thing would work. If you are genuinely kind or friendly it tends to attract weirdos usually outcast by others is my theory

[star1]

I am a big believer in freewill, but i also believe certain things we are fated/destined to do, as per our life contracts. We are meant to meet certain people, have certain experiences., etc....    Because i had no desire to be with him, no "magic spell" could make me be with him, hence it couldn't manipulate my freewill.  But in all honesty wth do we all know? Maybe we have zero free will and we re playing out parts written in a book eons ago.  Or is it partially written and we fill in the blanks? All we can do is speculate. But then what is the point of living things out if it's all prewritten?  I know I've had many de ja vus that were from dreams months before, am i remembering this life already lived? am i glimpsing into the future? I guess we just aren't meant to know. 

As far as I recall, she never told him i was in love with him,  this was in early 2000 no one was talking about twin flames then. That idea was among my spiritual circles and only became popularized by the internet. i have very different views on TF stuff.  What she said was that he was destined to be with a woman from his past that he loved very much. She did say that he'd be helping me during my split, and that this is where our "love" would grow and bloom.  the helping part was accurate, and that was told to him before we reunited. But then for all i know he was making it up and full of shit, because he knew i believed in this spiritual stuff.  But then again so did he. His beliefs i found out later on were on the darker side of things.

And i did run for the hills, seriously ,  lol  it was quite scary,  Ive had a few stalkers in my time, not very fun.

Yeah I like this, I believe in it, too. I'm on the fence about free will, but I certainly believe that some things are pre-destined too like when we die, people we meet etc.