Metaphysical, Spiritual and Psychic Discussions > Keen.com

Nobody predicted that I got cheated on

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LetItBe123:
@whitt that’s exactly the reasoning I’ve received from the couple advisors that I really feel are gifted. And they said that because there was no physical contact or sex or any strong emotional connection to any particular person then I guess it doesn’t pop up as anything. I can sort of understand it, I still don’t like the situation at all.
And yea some people on here said I must have obviously known he was being deceitful behind my back since I was so focused on it but that wasn’t the case. I’m just someone who has felt this pain before and thought why not ask a psychic if they pick up on anything. Anyway thank you for your kind words.

whit777:

--- Quote from: LetItBe123 on December 04, 2018, 09:14:12 PM ---@whitt that’s exactly the reasoning I’ve received from the couple advisors that I really feel are gifted. And they said that because there was no physical contact or sex or any strong emotional connection to any particular person then I guess it doesn’t pop up as anything. I can sort of understand it, I still don’t like the situation at all.
And yea some people on here said I must have obviously known he was being deceitful behind my back since I was so focused on it but that wasn’t the case. I’m just someone who has felt this pain before and thought why not ask a psychic if they pick up on anything. Anyway thank you for your kind words.

--- End quote ---

Well, everyone has their own way of trying to make sense of things and get through their lives with as little pain as possible. I've been suspicious of my bf since about two weeks after meeting him because he's a really kind person and I've been cheated on by every other guy I've ever been with. After a couple months of seeing him, I started questioning him about things and bringing things up to him like "aha! What's this whole thing about??" and in some crazy twist of fate, he was actually HONEST and the things he said as excuses that seemed more like lies than the actual liars told, turns out they checked out. He gave me times and dates of things to prove himself and I would go scope it out and it would be legit. I obviously felt bad each time but he still never lied and never cheated. I was being extremely difficult and untrusting of him without any reason and he took it like a man and just let me get it out of my system instead of running off to someone else and doing what I was afraid of. Even if he broke up with me for it, it still wouldn't have been to cheat. But he saw it as minor and he even said it's more of an inconvenience for me to be guessing where he is than for him to just tell me. He's just not a cheater or a liar. Nothing I do will change that. It's not perfect by any means, just like any other thing, but I'm just saying it's possible to be petrified and suspicious and a hot mess over something, and it doesn't automatically mean the universe will suddenly strike into him the desire to cheat. You have no control over who someone else is. There's nothing you could've done differently to change it. These are just my opinions but I have my own anecdotal evidence that convinces me of it. It just seems more logical that LOA or whatever variation of it, stops at someone else's free will.

Miss Philosopher:
I agree with Whitt with regard to the different ideas of cheating. Some people don't view chatting to the opposite sex as cheating. They don't even view flirting while chatting as cheating. They find it innocent and harmless because they don't have the intention to act on it. Rather, they just enjoy the attention. However, to me, all of that is still cheating. If you let your partner know that's a boundary of yours and what your definition of cheating or betrayal is, yet he continues to do it, clearly there's a lack of respect and love there. However, if you have explained your boundaries and definitions of cheating and betrayal and he still does it because he's being selfish, then you may want to take a second look at your relationship.

In my case, I made it clear and yet it was still done time and time again because some people are just that selfish and desperate for attention from anyone and everyone. Sad really but, because of that, it'd never work.

Miss Philosopher:
@stilltired: I agree. Most readers will say they didn't pick up a third party because it wasn't a "significant/serious" connection. That shouldn't matter because it's still a betrayal. There is no making excuses or justifying cheating and that's what most of them do so often. "Oh it's no big deal cause this other person means nothing to them". Oh yeah? Well it means something to ME. It means now I can't trust that person and I feel betrayed and that means for me that nothing will ever be the same again and it will all go to shit from there and basically end at some point. So, yeah. It's a big fk'n deal to me.

sawthelight:
A guy I knew long ago used to cheat constantly on his SO, but it was almost as if he didn't even view it as cheating..he was able to compartmentalize it...it was really bizarre.  He would talk of his SO and how he never saw himself being without her, but he cheated all the time...to this day, he makes my skin crawl.

I bet if a reader tried to read his thoughts/intentions, they would probably see it from his point of view in that he is not serious about any of the many women he cheated on her with but still, does that make it any better?

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