Here's A Story

[sarahkw]

I've learned a LOT on my spiritual journey over the last 5 or so years, about how long I've been calling psychics. I decided to share and see if maybe my story helps someone.

I started calling psychics after a guy, R, broke up with me. We were soul mates and I was past devastated. I don't even know how many I called but to say there were a lot would be a massive understatement. I eventually found Debra - WhiteLightAngel - and within a couple of times of talking to her, I stopped calling everyone else. Her advice coupled with her insights did me wonders. Before I connected with her, I was a MESS. It was not a good stretch of time for me, at all.

She would often tell me R was just 'sitting there.' He'd be about to call then stop. He got a new job and wanted me to know. But didn't call. I later learned all of this happened. She was insistent that he'd come back into the picture. I believed her for a while. Then he didn't come around. Recently, she said 'an ex is going to contact you.' My bet was on another guy, if anyone did. But guess who sent me an email out of the blue the other day, fishing to see if I was open to reconnecting? If you guessed R, you guessed right.

I've occasionally called Debra over the years for things and I have to say, she's been dead on. She predicted things with school, internships, friends, family... And I love the validations I get from her.

As I've been working to make a move in my career, I've consulted with Debra again as well as Sapphire, Kisha and Barbara. They all told me I'd get a job offer in December. I have. But if I take it, I have to move to another city and while this is, in ways, the perfect job for me, I'm really struggling on the move part and so I've consulted them all except Barbara over the last few days as well as NorthStarJulie who I saw recommended here.

To their credit, none of them have said 'you do this.' They've all told me its ultimately my decision. They have all also said its essentially a personal vs. professional move. Sapphire really struggled - she didn't want to TELL me what to do but her guides were insistently giving her a message and so she finally told me exactly what I was feeling - staying would be the best, would make me happy. But I wouldn't be miserable if I moved. Debra had a similar message while Kisha also said staying would be fine and I'd get another opportunity soon (Sapphire said this too) but leaving would open me up to 'future opportunities.' Julie was the most straightforward. She said 'on a personal level, you need to stay. If you want professional opportunities, you need to go.' My ultimate goal is happiness and so staying it is.

We'll see how this cookie crumbles!

Meanwhile, I've asked them some 'boy' questions at the tail end of these recent calls no. First about R who they all said two things: 1) He's in a different place than he was when you were together and is opening the door to see if you're interested and 2) He's a soul mate and he senses you're about to really move on. They all also were able to pick up on the fact that I'm not interested. We're a world a part now, not just in miles, and while he was a significant person in my life, he's no longer my heart's desire.

I also asked about J, a guy my mom and her boss (his mom) are trying to set me up with. All of them say we'll hit it off. Kisha and Debra think we'll date but nothing serious will happen. Julie and Sapphire gave me a little more detail though and said he'll be very interested. It will fall on me to move forward. They both urged me to give him a real chance past the initial meeting. Again, we'll see how that cookie crumbles!

I haven't mentioned much about Barbara. I read with her once and she nailed multiple things and several predictions have unfolded concerning family drama among small things like a little legal issue, California... I may read with her again before the holidays, just because she proved to be amazingly good for me.

So that's my story in a nutshell. I'm in a far better place these days then when I first picked up the phone. I have my own intuition that I trust infinitely. For me, calling these advisers helps me trust my own gut.

[hope4love]

Thanks for sharing your story and kudos to you for coming such a long way. I can so relate to being in an emotional mess and calling numerous psychics.  I'm not at all surprised that your ex contacted you after all this time; it happens more often than people think.
I do believe that we're all intuitive and yes, it seems that when an ex 'feels' you're truly going to move on, then bang! they reach out to you. 
I've been experiencing something similar with someone from my past whom I feel is my 'true soulmate'.  I definitely get the feeling that he wants to be in my life again but it's too late. I'm a much different person now than when we first met and I have no desire to be with him in a relationship. I don't know about a friendship and I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. 
I've learned that just because someone is your soulmate, you don't necessarily end up with that person. 
We have the answers within and sometimes it takes a while before the answers emerge.  When we're emotionally distraught, we're not able to gauge our intuition properly but it's there.

[sarahkw]

I really love this! Not too long ago, I 'let R go' for good. I'd long ago moved past him but I still had the cords if you will. I cut him loose and it was an immediate relief. Sapphire told me the flood gates would open in December when I as complaining about things being so stagnant for so long. She wasn't kidding. Geez!

Thanks for sharing your story and kudos to you for coming such a long way. I can so relate to being in an emotional mess and calling numerous psychics.  I'm not at all surprised that your ex contacted you after all this time; it happens more often than people think.
I do believe that we're all intuitive and yes, it seems that when an ex 'feels' you're truly going to move on, then bang! they reach out to you. 
I've been experiencing something similar with someone from my past whom I feel is my 'true soulmate'.  I definitely get the feeling that he wants to be in my life again but it's too late. I'm a much different person now than when we first met and I have no desire to be with him in a relationship. I don't know about a friendship and I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. 
I've learned that just because someone is your soulmate, you don't necessarily end up with that person. 
We have the answers within and sometimes it takes a while before the answers emerge.  When we're emotionally distraught, we're not able to gauge our intuition properly but it's there.

[hope4love]

nm

[Jonnie]

Thank you so much for sharing your story with us all....It inspired me not to give up, to have hope..and not to give in to my fears....thank you...moving on is hard to do not to live frozen in the past when the other party has moved on, but you keep holding on and on, and on..I dont want to be that person any longer...

[elcaliente]

sarahkw,
Great to read your post.  I think I surmised from your thread that this return occurred within a month or so of you cutting the cord.  Is that correct?

[sarahkw]

Roughly, yes!

He's asked to see me while I'm home for the holidays. I haven't decided if I will but I do know we're not right for each other now. Like I said, we are not only several hundreds of miles apart now, we're also a world apart as far as our personal lives.

sarahkw,
Great to read your post.  I think I surmised from your thread that this return occurred within a month or so of you cutting the cord.  Is that correct?

[sarahkw]

I decided I'd give an update to my little story.

Since the summer, I'd been consulting with a handful of readers regarding a new job. I had a great job - on paper - but I was over it for a number of reasons and ready to move on. I was just so unhappy there and it was affecting other parts of my life as well.

There was a job back in August that I really really wanted at the time. Debra (WhiteLightAngel) and Kisha both said I'd get it. Sapphire initially said yes, I'd get it. Unlike Debra and Kisha, she read a lot deeper into things though, really drawing out a lot of my fears and concerns and bless her, she did everything she could to get me to stop the self-sabatoging I was doing. Lots of negative thoughts.

Debra and Kisha were both dead on about a lot of the details surrounding the interview process. Sapphire went as far as to tell me things they'd say and coach me on how to best approach the situation. As I got down to the final three candidates after a VERY long process, it was starting to really take a toll on me. She told me as nicely as she could that I would get what I thought I deserved. Ultimately, I didn't get the job - and Sapphire, who had initial stages had told me I'd get it, was the one who saw I wouldn't.

Kisha - have to give her credit. When I told her I didn't get the job, she immediately sent me minutes equivalent to the time I spent on the phone with her. She's definitely ethical, can't argue that.

I stopped reading with Debra who I still really love and appreciate because she just doesn't seem to work with me anymore. She gets little things but the days of big 'wow' moments are gone.

Barbara, Kisha and Sapphire all saw a job offer in March/April. I got the offer in March and started in April. The big kicker though? I MOVED. Over the summer, I would have NEVER EVER considered leaving the city I was living in. But by end of year, I had a deep desire to return home. The very first job I applied for, I got. I swear, I even knew I'd get it when I saw the initial listing for the job. It was odd. Also, there was a LOT Of back and forth and even a 'canceled' interview at one point with the company I now work for. Even when they said the cancellation was a mistake, I went as far as to say I wasn't interested and yet they came after me yet again until I interviewed and ultimately got the job. Sapphire had kept telling me 'it's just not over. It's not over' even when I told her I'd TOLD them it was over.

I've only read with Kisha once in the last six months and that was recently. I'll eat crow on this one - I'd said I wouldn't read with her again because I didn't care for how she delivered her readings - sort of blunt and straightforward. But last week, I found myself NEEDING that and so, I called her. I asked her about a guy and she told me exactly what I knew but needed to hear - that it's on *me* for how this turns out. She also saw a '1' around him. I've never met him face to face, only business emails, but what do you know? The next day he emailed me, asking if I'd let him 'pick my brain' in the next few weeks about a few things.

To eat a little more crow, Barbara has been excellent for me, even though I've also said I don't care for tarot readers. There are now countless little details and predictions she's been right on - I went on a date with a Leo, moved for my job, got into an argument with my mother, a big disruption within my family leading up to the holidays was resolved peacefully... There's quite a list, at this point.

The last time I talked to her, I had a few minutes left after she answered what I'd called for so I asked her about the guy I mentioned above. She said 'there will be a delay but I see family and love between you.' Now I don't know about the family and love, of course, but she was bang on about the delay. I had the chance to hang out with him a couple weeks ago and in a moment of panic, I conveniently made plans that conflicted so I couldn't make it. Barbara, Kisha and Sapphire have all had a few words with me over my relationship-related fears. I'm working on those.

Sapphire has been great. I really rely on her for guidance and to see deeper into a situation versus predictions. She also helps me trust myself with my own intuition. I was reading with her every couple of weeks at the end of the year for 10 or so minutes at a time and several times, she told me she saw bright blue eyes. I've since identified who those eyes belong to. We're pending on if she's right about other things.

Lastly, I gave Joeana a try. I've read with her 3 times since the beginning of the year and I actually really, really like her. She's been able to pick up so much without me telling her a thing, lot of little details and bigger things as well. Predictions are pending but the last time we talked was before the 'delay' I mentioned above. She saw me doing just that and urged me not to but hey, I didn't listen.

I'm in a good place and don't read very often any more. When I do, it's usually with Sapphire and it's usually because I'm getting my own messages and feelings during my quiet time and prayers that are too overwhelming for me to process on my own.I need my own 'coach' at this point!

I *do* have a reading scheduled for Wednesday with a local reader. I'm nervous. I've never read with someone in person! She's supposedly very, VERY good and also very spiritual which is important to me. Any tips on in person readings?

Thanks for reading if you made it this far!

[whiteangel]

Regarding the theme of cutting the cords.  I just posted an update under CP/Abrielle which gives a little more detail about my story, but to anyone struggling with letting go of someone, in the last month or so, I was led to some information that upset me, but I really needed to see/find.  I got some psychic validation from the only two readers that had given me even a glimpse in my readings with them of what I had found out, and I realized that it was really time to let go. I let go 'psychically' anyway from a man that I had been waiting on (granted, i was actually dating other people the whole time, but I still had a powerful flame lit for him in my heart and because I was being told by every psychic in the book that he'd be back and want to move forward, I kept hanging on...). 

Anyway, I finally let it go when reality caught up with psychic induced fantasy land and boom - right under my very nose, someone who had been trying to get my attention for a little while now just appeared to me in a totally different light - he got my attention big time and has kept it ever since (granted, we're only talking a little over a month here) BUT the point is that if I hadn't 'released' him and given myself the closure I needed, I would not have noticed this new person in the way that I have now.  I don't know what the future holds, but I know that this person is special and important and we're meant to connect now.  I'm 100% certain that I would have continued to dismiss him if I hadn't cut that cord which produced an an almost immediate shift in my energy that I can barely even believe the results of.   

And, one other thing -- I had been praying for signs about whether to reach out to the man I was waiting on to get closure. I didn't get any of the signs that I had asked for, but I was led to the information that caused this whole chapter to close. So, I think when we're ready and we ask for help from the Universe to move on, it really sets things in motion.

I've felt more 'alive' and less like I need to try to control everything (or at least another person)  in this past month than I have in the last almost 2 years. I hope those of you 'waiting' on someone will find something that will kick start you out of the waiting and cause you to shift your focus just long enough to see what you might be missing while your waiting.

And, yes, I also realize that now that I finally feel over him and like I wouldn't even want him anymore, he'll probably reappear!

[hope4love]

nm

[allbitenobark]

Great post whiteangel, thank you for sharing. I also have recently been feeling ready to cut all cords with my ex. Do you mind sharing how you went about doing this?

[whiteangel]

I'm glad that sharing this experience has been helpful to you...

I think it's been a combination of things, including it approaching around a year of hanging on and so not wanting to spend another year in the same pattern. The other factor is that the readings are really financially catching up to me and to continue to spend money on them when I am finally able to see that they are not serving me is all coming together.  Enough time has passed with things not panning out the way they were predicted to and I can finally start to be objective and realistic about it. 

Then, the information that I found was another reality check, probably the strongest.   What's interesting is that I could easily have found this info some time ago, had I wanted to but I don't think I did. I just wasn't ready.  On some level I even knew that.     

I'm hardly out of the woods yet on the addiction to readings, but I have no interest in asking about this person anymore which is HUGE.  I just need to be cautious about not finding something new to try to control and I don't pretend that's going to be easy - although I genuinely feel so much better having cut these particular cords.

I've mentioned this before, but I really identified with Natalie Lue's book the Dreamer and The Fantasy Relationship. I think many of us are not liking the information that we're readily perceiving with our 5 senses, and even with our own intuition and so we look to readings to change that and get a story that we'd prefer.  At least, I feel that this is what I was doing.  This whole situation was piggybacked onto a painful divorce and so I was already in a vulnerable spot and part of me is just learning to see and accept that for what it was.

One other thing, in the process of letting go of this, I also allowed myself to experience the anger that I felt.  When psychics explain away why a person is acting like a you know what, for me, it can lead to a denial that I'm actually hurt and angry.  When you've got someone that your paying to tell you that someone is scared, not ready, has low self esteem, thinks your too good for them, and so on and so forth, you dismiss your feelings in favor of this version of reality and press reset and all better again, and back to waiting around mode.  This is exactly what these fairy tale readings were doing for me.  As soon as I'd start to feel angry, sad, whatever, I'd get a reading, explain it all away and it then seemed perfectly normal to keep waiting again.

So, in conclusion, I think it's a matter of time+money+reality = let go

I also really wanted this, to let this go, so I've been struggling and doing a lot of self reflection, etc.  Over the course of my life, anything that I've really struggled with to quit, once it's time, it's actually pretty easy.  It's just all the stars lining up, but you have to line them up, push and shove and cajole those stars into place --  and once they're there, in line, Voilah! Shift! and onward.

I've also noticed that many of the readings that I've gotten over the years where I didn't really love what I heard - those are probably the ones I should have paid a lot more attention to.  When you get a reading where everything is going to be fantastic, I'd be more skeptical about those...

Beyond all of these thoughts, I'm not a person to be giving advice. I'm still struggling, but this was a big event for me and I do feel so much better.  Like I said, I'll still get readings, but I firmly believe that the future is changeable and it's up to us to create it.

If/when I feel like getting a reading (even if on a new person or subject matter), it's also been helpful to me to review all of my old notes and focus on all of the things that were wrong, inaccurate, did not happen, etc. And really sit with that stuff instead of focusing on the few hits out of many more misses. 

 I've also realized that many psychics can predict things that happen for sure, but often times these things don't matter anyway. For instance, recently, I had several of my 'go-to's' predict very precisely a guy that I'd meet and date (actually most of my psychics are VERY good at predicting people that come into my life). This particular guy, some even said I'd marry him but guess what? I could barely stand to be around him.  I gave myself a little time to be absolutely sure of my feelings, but do you know how confusing that is to be told in great detail about a person you'll meet, that he'll be so fantastic that you'll want to marry him and you can't even stand to be on a date with him??? So, great, fine, prediction made, but it didn't matter! And, even worse, had they NOT  predicted him and told me how fantastic he'd be, I'd  never have wanted to date him in the first place, which in hindsight, would have been a much better choice for both of us because I probably wound up hurting him, which if I had listened to my own intuition on this matter I would have already known.   This particular situation also helped me to clarify which psychics I actually think are useful for me (already mentioned in my original post) since they were very clear about this person not being a suitable match for me. 

Point being, we really have to take all of this stuff with a massive grain of salt.  I've been seeing this time and time again, a prediction happens but it really had no consequence --  Now, let's just say the man I've just let go of contacts me now, guess what? I wouldn't even care! So, all of the psychics would be right, but it doesn't matter! 

Laughing at oneself is helpful too. The complete absurdity of all of this. Learning to see the humor in hearing the sound of all of our money being flushed down the metaphysical toilet! We are definitely our own worst enemies here. I  honestly don't think these psychics have much to do with it. We're just mirroring our own neurotic energy back at ourselves through them.  I'm speaking for myself, but I know some of us feel this way.  And, even in spite of some of my psychics being so incredibly off about so many things, I still don't hold any negativity toward them -- another book that has helped me to process what many of us here are doing is "Messages from Spirit" by Collette Baron Reid.  I've mentioned it before, and possibly even heard about it on this forum (don't remember) but she goes into great detail about all of this for any newbies out there looking for more tangible information on addiction to psychic readings.

I wish us all a lot of luck! Of course if there are any significant updates to this fairytale, I'll let you all know.

[jordie]

Whiteangel, what you said here is what prevents me from calling.

" The other factor is that the readings are really financially catching up to me and to continue to spend money on them when I am finally able to see that they are not serving me is all coming together. "

I was feeling a bit unsure the other day and almost called. I then thought to myself would what I hear be really worth the money I would spend?  No!!  I want to go to the movies this weekend, so I did not make the call. Am hoping I can hold onto the resolve to not call because I am also tired of feeling the need to get information from a third party which can or can not be right.

[marybell]

I'm glad that sharing this experience has been helpful to you...

I think it's been a combination of things, including it approaching around a year of hanging on and so not wanting to spend another year in the same pattern. The other factor is that the readings are really financially catching up to me and to continue to spend money on them when I am finally able to see that they are not serving me is all coming together.  Enough time has passed with things not panning out the way they were predicted to and I can finally start to be objective and realistic about it. 

Then, the information that I found was another reality check, probably the strongest.   What's interesting is that I could easily have found this info some time ago, had I wanted to but I don't think I did. I just wasn't ready.  On some level I even knew that.     

I'm hardly out of the woods yet on the addiction to readings, but I have no interest in asking about this person anymore which is HUGE.  I just need to be cautious about not finding something new to try to control and I don't pretend that's going to be easy - although I genuinely feel so much better having cut these particular cords.

I've mentioned this before, but I really identified with Natalie Lue's book the Dreamer and The Fantasy Relationship. I think many of us are not liking the information that we're readily perceiving with our 5 senses, and even with our own intuition and so we look to readings to change that and get a story that we'd prefer.  At least, I feel that this is what I was doing.  This whole situation was piggybacked onto a painful divorce and so I was already in a vulnerable spot and part of me is just learning to see and accept that for what it was.

One other thing, in the process of letting go of this, I also allowed myself to experience the anger that I felt.  When psychics explain away why a person is acting like a you know what, for me, it can lead to a denial that I'm actually hurt and angry.  When you've got someone that your paying to tell you that someone is scared, not ready, has low self esteem, thinks your too good for them, and so on and so forth, you dismiss your feelings in favor of this version of reality and press reset and all better again, and back to waiting around mode.  This is exactly what these fairy tale readings were doing for me.  As soon as I'd start to feel angry, sad, whatever, I'd get a reading, explain it all away and it then seemed perfectly normal to keep waiting again.

So, in conclusion, I think it's a matter of time+money+reality = let go

I also really wanted this, to let this go, so I've been struggling and doing a lot of self reflection, etc.  Over the course of my life, anything that I've really struggled with to quit, once it's time, it's actually pretty easy.  It's just all the stars lining up, but you have to line them up, push and shove and cajole those stars into place --  and once they're there, in line, Voilah! Shift! and onward.

I've also noticed that many of the readings that I've gotten over the years where I didn't really love what I heard - those are probably the ones I should have paid a lot more attention to.  When you get a reading where everything is going to be fantastic, I'd be more skeptical about those...

Beyond all of these thoughts, I'm not a person to be giving advice. I'm still struggling, but this was a big event for me and I do feel so much better.  Like I said, I'll still get readings, but I firmly believe that the future is changeable and it's up to us to create it.

If/when I feel like getting a reading (even if on a new person or subject matter), it's also been helpful to me to review all of my old notes and focus on all of the things that were wrong, inaccurate, did not happen, etc. And really sit with that stuff instead of focusing on the few hits out of many more misses. 

 I've also realized that many psychics can predict things that happen for sure, but often times these things don't matter anyway. For instance, recently, I had several of my 'go-to's' predict very precisely a guy that I'd meet and date (actually most of my psychics are VERY good at predicting people that come into my life). This particular guy, some even said I'd marry him but guess what? I could barely stand to be around him.  I gave myself a little time to be absolutely sure of my feelings, but do you know how confusing that is to be told in great detail about a person you'll meet, that he'll be so fantastic that you'll want to marry him and you can't even stand to be on a date with him??? So, great, fine, prediction made, but it didn't matter! And, even worse, had they NOT  predicted him and told me how fantastic he'd be, I'd  never have wanted to date him in the first place, which in hindsight, would have been a much better choice for both of us because I probably wound up hurting him, which if I had listened to my own intuition on this matter I would have already known.   This particular situation also helped me to clarify which psychics I actually think are useful for me (already mentioned in my original post) since they were very clear about this person not being a suitable match for me. 

Point being, we really have to take all of this stuff with a massive grain of salt.  I've been seeing this time and time again, a prediction happens but it really had no consequence --  Now, let's just say the man I've just let go of contacts me now, guess what? I wouldn't even care! So, all of the psychics would be right, but it doesn't matter! 

Laughing at oneself is helpful too. The complete absurdity of all of this. Learning to see the humor in hearing the sound of all of our money being flushed down the metaphysical toilet! We are definitely our own worst enemies here. I  honestly don't think these psychics have much to do with it. We're just mirroring our own neurotic energy back at ourselves through them.  I'm speaking for myself, but I know some of us feel this way.  And, even in spite of some of my psychics being so incredibly off about so many things, I still don't hold any negativity toward them -- another book that has helped me to process what many of us here are doing is "Messages from Spirit" by Collette Baron Reid.  I've mentioned it before, and possibly even heard about it on this forum (don't remember) but she goes into great detail about all of this for any newbies out there looking for more tangible information on addiction to psychic readings.

I wish us all a lot of luck! Of course if there are any significant updates to this fairytale, I'll let you all know.

Whiteangel, This is so profound. Thank you for sharing.

[wishfulthinker]

One other thing, in the process of letting go of this, I also allowed myself to experience the anger that I felt.  When psychics explain away why a person is acting like a you know what, for me, it can lead to a denial that I'm actually hurt and angry.  When you've got someone that your paying to tell you that someone is scared, not ready, has low self esteem, thinks your too good for them, and so on and so forth, you dismiss your feelings in favor of this version of reality and press reset and all better again, and back to waiting around mode.  This is exactly what these fairy tale readings were doing for me.  As soon as I'd start to feel angry, sad, whatever, I'd get a reading, explain it all away and it then seemed perfectly normal to keep waiting again.
*****
Whiteangel.....Thank you so much for these words of wisdom!!   This was a brilliant explanation of how this addiction really works. 
I am so guilty of this same thing.  I am really angry.  I mean really angry.  But I cover it up because of the exact same reasons.  He is confused, unsettled, on the fence, going through a rough patch.
He will finally do whatever we have been pining for (fill in the blank here) tomorrow, next week, next month, or as some as stated next year.
I stuff my feelings down instead of stating how I really feel "loud and clear".
Let's all be honest here:  would this person spend the time, energy and money that we have to find out what we are thinking.
HELL NO!!!!
These readings have heavily influenced my reaction to - MY OWN LIFE.