The Psychic Reviews
Relationship Psychology Discussions => The Vent => Topic started by: Miss Philosopher on November 28, 2018, 12:49:58 AM
-
Wow. So I read with psychic Logan for the first time on November 2nd (this month). She's on California Psychics. She was like whoa creepy accurate. Then, I just had a reading about two hours ago with her and it was polar opposite of the last reading, just 25 days ago.
First Reading November 2nd: Asked her about the ex and if there's feelings etc and what she saw coming up. She said "Love is the vibration". She even saw that he didn't know where he belonged and was back and forth between states. LOL. That reading sort of gave me chills. Said he'd step up and come forward in March. Told her I felt a third party was involved. She said NO. "They're telling me false accusations". So she said what I was thinking/feeling was false. She told me I needed to have patience with him and just send him "love and healing" energies but that he would "get his shit together and step up in March".
Second reading today (just 25 days later): Asked the same questions. Said he has feelings of love but not strong enough to stand the test of time. Said he IS involved with someone else and has been since end of August. (Strange cause it was September 7th that he reconciled with me after 2 months so I know that was bullshit). Said this female was financially helping him. False. It's his mother that is. Said they would break up in February. Said he would contact me in a 5 and attempt to reconcile in a back door type of way. Then said it wouldn't be until way past his birthday (which is in March). She also told me that I could "thank his mother for the reason the relationship failed". LOL! He barely had anything to do with his mother all of these years. For the last 7 months she's been helping him financially, yeah but she isn't the reason. So full of shit. Like, if you can't connect, then say it.
So, let me get this straight. First reading there was no one as of November 2nd. Second reading there has been someone else there since end of August. How was that not picked up in the first reading and I was even told that I was giving false accusations? Lol. We go from "love is the vibration" 25 days ago and it was just oh so strong to...........well the first 3 years he really did love you but then it sort of faded, in this reading but that there's still love there it's just not so strong......which that part may actually be true.
I will say this much............there was never strong love in the beginning. In fact it grew over the years and was the strongest this year. I will say that I already know there's a third party based upon my own intuition and my other three go to's. However, it isn't as serious as she's trying to make it out to be.
My lesson is.........just stick with the ones that have been working consistently for the last 5 years and don't try anyone new cause it's an absolute waste.
This reading made me feel the need to spend even more money and call Aliza cause I was so confused, which she is the one that is the best at picking up third parties without you even asking. She'll tell you what kind of connection it is as well. If it's serious or not etc. So I spoke with her about 15 minutes ago and she was very consistent with her last reading on November 7th. Her last reading, she said there was a third party that was very flirty etc but that it was sort of inconsistent and wouldn't go anywhere and the third party was sending him mixed signals. Today she said this third party energy is lingering, which means it's recent but is fading. Her reading is in line with Kisha who said the third party would be gone within 5 weeks and that he'd feel third party was sending him mixed messages and wasn't really into him all like that but that it was someone he was just having "companionship" with but that said female just was nice to him and viewed him more as a friend and just wasn't into him like that. She said that back on November 3rd. 5 weeks from the date of that reading brings it to end of next week. Again, matching Aliza who says the third party energy is fading.
I'm gonna stick with my only three go to's and never try a new one ever again. My go to's have been consistently accurate for years and years now so idk why I even try new ones. Maybe out of curiosity? Boredom? I don't even know.
I'm gonna let go of this dude anyway. It isn't worth the stress anymore. Besides, all three of my go to's see someone else coming in by February and they ALL say he's a much better man, more mature on every level, etc. Kisha said I'd feel more comfortable and secure in that relationship. Shelly said I'd be married by the time I was 42. Aliza just now finished describing new person and said I'd meet him in February and 14 months from the time we began, he'd ask me to marry him. That fits Shelly's prediction of me being married at 42. I'll be 41 end of January.
Honestly I feel like an absolute desperate idiot calling about this person. I guess I needed to do it to help me get through the disappointment. Thankfully, the pain is starting to fade. Kisha told me don't call again until the new year because she didn't feel anything would change from the information she already gave. One thing I do know is, I'm really done with this dude. I just wanna be happy and if calling psychics to help me get through this bullshit time, then so be it. I guess they have their uses.
-
Isn't that some bullshit? She told me like 2 hours ago that he "would respond to the vibration of 5" meaning he'd contact me with the number 5 being involved. 5 days, weeks, hours, 5th of the month blah blah. Well, literally I got a text from him just a few minutes ago and there was no number 5 involved. She's crap. The female she got helping him with money is his mother. No doubt there's a third party but it ain't that serious and will dissipate. That's what I FEEL in my own gut and that's what my regulars tell me anyway and they're always right for me for years.
I just don't recommend her and I'm not trying anymore new psychics and wasting anymore money on this bullshit situation. I need to get my head out of my ass and just move on. I'm so angry with myself right now.
I'm glad you understand the bullshit readings lol.
-
Second reading today (just 25 days later): Asked the same questions. Said he has feelings of love but not strong enough to stand the test of time. Said he IS involved with someone else and has been since end of August. (Strange cause it was September 7th that he reconciled with me after 2 months so I know that was bullshit). Said this female was financially helping him. False. It's his mother that is.
I've had that happen too, they would tell me my ex was involved with someone but when they described her, it was a female relative (who he was living with and was helping him financially.)
That's crazy bad, I've never had this happen before. :o
-
Hopefully you never do. It's the most confusing, useless, money sucking, change your entire mood thing. But, she was already proven wrong with just two hours. Nuff said lol.
-
I guess in a way the upside is that it's lucky that it's a family member and nobody of significance?
-
@Star1: At this point, I don't even think it would really make a difference. 5 years is a long time to waste on one person waiting for them to decide to finally "choose you" over everything else and over everyone else. 5 years of breadcrumbs and trying to trust a person that has proven time and time again that they cannot be trusted just makes me an idiot really. That's my fault though. I should have cared about myself more than that but for whatever reason, I guess I didn't. I don't know. I'm really confused right now. Hopefully more clarity will come soon.
-
That's what I FEEL in my own gut and that's what my regulars tell me anyway and they're always right for me for years.
Going with your gut always best. I always had this stuff happen when my regular readers were not available and I tried someone new. They would flip flop and misinterpret things all over the place. I had readers tell me no the ex was not involved with anyone. Then next time they would say, yes he is. And they would describe women who were either relatives, or married friends, or sometimes I swear they were just making crap up because it would be something that didn't sound like him at all.
Yep. You call them and they say he loves you, is coming back and misses you. Call them second time: he loves you still, but he's chatting to people but nothing has/is going to happen, because he loves you. Third call: he's with someone. But they're not happy, he's leaving her for you. Happened sooo many times.
-
@stilltired: I completely agree. I wish I would have listened to it 5 years ago. But, because of psychic readings, I didn't. I was talking to other readers besides my go to's at that time. 5 years ago it told me to steer clear and I felt like I knew how he was but I ignored it, made excuses and told myself that it wasn't fair to judge without experiencing first.
7 months ago, my gut said it was the last time I'd see said person again either forever, or for a very long time to come. Not sure if that was just my gut knowing that I'd had enough way back then, or something else. Either way, I felt it so strongly. It's hard for me to get outside of my emotions though and really "hear" my gut. This has always been a problem for me.
-
@Star1: That's some seriously real talk. That is usually how it happens and so what's the point. So, I know what's coming in the next few months........more bullshit and a bit of "reconciling" only to be more bullshit right after. The bullshit just seems to increase and get worse as the years go on. So yeah, what's the point. I'm tired of it all now.
-
@Star1: At this point, I don't even think it would really make a difference. 5 years is a long time to waste on one person waiting for them to decide to finally "choose you" over everything else and over everyone else. 5 years of breadcrumbs and trying to trust a person that has proven time and time again that they cannot be trusted just makes me an idiot really. That's my fault though. I should have cared about myself more than that but for whatever reason, I guess I didn't. I don't know. I'm really confused right now. Hopefully more clarity will come soon.
I think it's because these readers do the whole "he just needs to be mature and he can be the perfect man for you", line. Then before you know it, 5 years have passed. I can't believe how much time I've wasted on this fella. I promised myself it'd be alot less, and here I am. I know that we have had our disagreements, but nobody deserves to be treated badly. Yes, it is none of my business and no I won't post about your situation as it's not my place to, but you do not deserve to be treated like that. Find you someone who supports you with the getting outside if you're ready for it, and someone who treats you like a lady - not a woman. But he came into your life for reasons, to perhaps get tougher and stronger in life.. Life begins at 40!
-
@Star1: That's some seriously real talk. That is usually how it happens and so what's the point. So, I know what's coming in the next few months........more bullshit and a bit of "reconciling" only to be more bullshit right after. The bullshit just seems to increase and get worse as the years go on. So yeah, what's the point. I'm tired of it all now.
And that's how "Still Tired" got their name lol.
-
@Star1: Lmao. That makes sense that's how she got her name. Yeah all disagreements aside, perhaps I was being too abrasive or something. I've been told about my approach. It can be easily misunderstood. I'm working on it. Life lessons for me.
Yeah, even Kisha STILL says "He means well and has the intention of blah blah blah and wants things to work out but he just isn't in a space where he can commit to changing is his life and as long as he makes no changes, you will continue to repeat this same cycle over and over again.". I appreciate her honesty as many times I've called him a narcissist to her and she said "No. I don't get he's a narcissist. He can be very very selfish but he doesn't intentionally try to harm you." I feel that's true but that doesn't change the fact that I'm always getting hurt.
I'm waiting for the new guy and that's it. I've made up my mind. Today that is. It's subject to change tomorrow. Meh. With time I will be more consistent with my decision after all these retrogrades clear up. I know many people probably don't take astrology stuff too seriously. I do and I observe what happens during these times in my whole life, with myself, with others that I know. I'm glad new guy hasn't come in yet cause it's still retrograde so whatever gets started during this time as far as relationships go, usually fizzle out shortly thereafter. Yes, I have issues. Lol.
-
@Star1: Lmao. That makes sense that's how she got her name. Yeah all disagreements aside, perhaps I was being too abrasive or something. I've been told about my approach. It can be easily misunderstood. I'm working on it. Life lessons for me.
Yeah, even Kisha STILL says "He means well and has the intention of blah blah blah and wants things to work out but he just isn't in a space where he can commit to changing is his life and as long as he makes no changes, you will continue to repeat this same cycle over and over again.". I appreciate her honesty as many times I've called him a narcissist to her and she said "No. I don't get he's a narcissist. He can be very very selfish but he doesn't intentionally try to harm you." I feel that's true but that doesn't change the fact that I'm always getting hurt.
I'm waiting for the new guy and that's it. I've made up my mind. Today that is. It's subject to change tomorrow. Meh. With time I will be more consistent with my decision after all these retrogrades clear up. I know many people probably don't take astrology stuff too seriously. I do and I observe what happens during these times in my whole life, with myself, with others that I know. I'm glad new guy hasn't come in yet cause it's still retrograde so whatever gets started during this time as far as relationships go, usually fizzle out shortly thereafter. Yes, I have issues. Lol.
That is where I disagree with Kisha. From what you have posted about him on here so far, it sounds very narcissistic and toxic. I would know, because other ex was like it and he would throw breadcrumbs, disappear for months, turn up like nothing happened expecting motherly love and other material stuff. I have to be frank, it's concerning that she condones his treatment of you, because if she condones it, your mind automatically will think "Ah poor him, it's not his fault. Even Kisha said he isn't a bad guy", etc.
I do hope that you get to meet this new guy and start afresh, or a lightening bolt strikes this one on the head lol.
-
@stilltired: I completely agree. I wish I would have listened to it 5 years ago. But, because of psychic readings, I didn't. I was talking to other readers besides my go to's at that time. 5 years ago it told me to steer clear and I felt like I knew how he was but I ignored it, made excuses and told myself that it wasn't fair to judge without experiencing first.
7 months ago, my gut said it was the last time I'd see said person again either forever, or for a very long time to come. Not sure if that was just my gut knowing that I'd had enough way back then, or something else. Either way, I felt it so strongly. It's hard for me to get outside of my emotions though and really "hear" my gut. This has always been a problem for me.
Same here...my gut told me all along but I didn't trust it. And I was calling about the same guy for about 5-6 years. I called about other things too and it's not like it was all about him. But I mean, it went on way too long. I listened to what readers said instead of trusting my own instincts, and their advice was all over the place. It was like I was on some horrible roller coaster that flipped me upside down constantly and I lost all sense of where the ground was.
I learned to trust myself a lot more though. It's like finally there was nothing left anymore except this deep, unshakable knowing that this would never work out. I'm not saying that has to be the outcome everyone comes to, but what I mean is eventually all the things readers told you just fall away. And you're left with the essential truth of the situation, whatever that may be.
I used to be really hard on myself, after I listened to some nonsense from a reader or had a binge or otherwise did something I felt stupid about. A lot of us have been there. I regret all of it, but it brought me to where I am now. I am also 40. And all if what happened with readings and my ex is starting to feel like another lifetime ago. I feel like life has other things in store for me now.
If I could describe readings in one word, roller-coaster. You have the highs when you get told something good, but then you feel hopeless again so have the lows and the negative readings. Then ignoring your own gut when it's screaming at you - BIG mistake.
-
I'm sorry you had to go through that stilltired. I'll be 41 end of January. I'm very very tired. I just want peace even if it means single for the rest of my life. I'm totally fine with that as long as I don't have that drain anymore. One day, coming very very soon, I will be at the point where you are. I'm 90% there. I'm just really tired, like I said, on a soul level.
@Star1: Yes it's a terrible roller coaster emotionally. Even when you get a mixed negative/positive reading...........more time goes by with nothing happening and then you get another reading..............and then the moment something does happen you then go and get another reading to see what's coming up. I think, as you've said before and many others as well, looking at the behavior of POI in the here and now and reviewing the patterns of said POI from the start to now.......is what we have to go by and make our decisions on that. I don't know. I know that I call because in some twisted way, it helps me get by until I reach the point where I'm done on my own. Maybe that makes me weak but that's what I do. Maybe someday I will find another way. I will start looking.
'
-
I'm sorry you had to go through that stilltired. I'll be 41 end of January. I'm very very tired. I just want peace even if it means single for the rest of my life. I'm totally fine with that as long as I don't have that drain anymore. One day, coming very very soon, I will be at the point where you are. I'm 90% there. I'm just really tired, like I said, on a soul level.
@Star1: Yes it's a terrible roller coaster emotionally. Even when you get a mixed negative/positive reading...........more time goes by with nothing happening and then you get another reading..............and then the moment something does happen you then go and get another reading to see what's coming up. I think, as you've said before and many others as well, looking at the behavior of POI in the here and now and reviewing the patterns of said POI from the start to now.......is what we have to go by and make our decisions on that. I don't know. I know that I call because in some twisted way, it helps me get by until I reach the point where I'm done on my own. Maybe that makes me weak but that's what I do. Maybe someday I will find another way. I will start looking.
'
It just becomes a never ending cycle of constant readings, it becomes unhealthy and repetitive and I do think that we have to use logic sometimes and the way that the ex is behaving with us, now. Like, it's hard to believe they care when they're not in contact for so long or are in on and off contact.
-
This happened to me so many times with readings, where I will get this fantastic, on point (or so I thought at the time) reading, and then try again a few weeks later, even with the same reader, and get conflicting info. I remember feeling so defeated....and sad when that happened, because you basically have to dismiss both readings at that point.
What a waste of time, emotions and money this whole process is!
-
@stilltired: I completely agree. I wish I would have listened to it 5 years ago. But, because of psychic readings, I didn't. I was talking to other readers besides my go to's at that time. 5 years ago it told me to steer clear and I felt like I knew how he was but I ignored it, made excuses and told myself that it wasn't fair to judge without experiencing first.
7 months ago, my gut said it was the last time I'd see said person again either forever, or for a very long time to come. Not sure if that was just my gut knowing that I'd had enough way back then, or something else. Either way, I felt it so strongly. It's hard for me to get outside of my emotions though and really "hear" my gut. This has always been a problem for me.
Same here...my gut told me all along but I didn't trust it. And I was calling about the same guy for about 5-6 years. I called about other things too and it's not like it was all about him. But I mean, it went on way too long. I listened to what readers said instead of trusting my own instincts, and their advice was all over the place. It was like I was on some horrible roller coaster that flipped me upside down constantly and I lost all sense of where the ground was.
I learned to trust myself a lot more though. It's like finally there was nothing left anymore except this deep, unshakable knowing that this would never work out. I'm not saying that has to be the outcome everyone comes to, but what I mean is eventually all the things readers told you just fall away. And you're left with the essential truth of the situation, whatever that may be.
I used to be really hard on myself, after I listened to some nonsense from a reader or had a binge or otherwise did something I felt stupid about. A lot of us have been there. I regret all of it, but it brought me to where I am now. I am also 40. And all if what happened with readings and my ex is starting to feel like another lifetime ago. I feel like life has other things in store for me now.
OMG yes, this is so damn true and I can so relate!
-
@sawthelight: Yeah it's really frustrating and then it leads to more readings because now you're trying to get clarity. The stupid thing is, we never get like "real" clarity". It's just a bunch of different people's words thrown into the mix. Who does one believe? The normal go to's or the new one? Lol. I'll stick with my go to's but really, I just need to not have anymore readings about this situation. Stilltired is right...........the readings fall away and something happens within you and you realize certain things. Like, I am now also realizing that "this" is just never going to work out. Mine isn't a case of "Oh he'll go explore and see what the world has to offer and then suddenly realize it's me he wants to be with". This guy is 36 years old. He has the same patterns with me that he did in his 10 year marriage, only different is that I don't have his kids. This guy is addicted to the newness of a situation and that's where it ends and this is a reality I didn't want to face.
I read a meme yesterday on FB that said "A woman's loyalty is tested when a man has nothing. A man's loyalty is tested when he has everything". In my experience, this has been nothing but the truth. I'm the kind of person that hasn't cared if the guy had his life completely together or was in between job and had no material to offer etc. I looked at the heart and mind. That, however, I've come to learn, is a huge mistake for me. This guy has clung on to me for dear life since I was the only one around when no one else was, even his own family members, for the last 5 years. Suddenly, his family steps up and supports him, he gets where he wants, and then I get the cold shoulder and discarded. Granted, the guy keeps in contact once per week but it isn't because he just values me as a person or something. It's because things are still not 100% where he's located and very unstable. He really has opened my eyes this time around. I'm glad he has behaved the way he has for the past 7 months. Now there is NO doubt about what it's really been all about and it just confirmed what I always felt but wanted to ignore. Gotta trust your gut. I'm also tired of going broke trying to figure him out via psychics. I still feel so angry with myself doing these stupid things.
-
@sawthelight: Yeah it's really frustrating and then it leads to more readings because now you're trying to get clarity. The stupid thing is, we never get like "real" clarity". It's just a bunch of different people's words thrown into the mix. Who does one believe? The normal go to's or the new one? Lol. I'll stick with my go to's but really, I just need to not have anymore readings about this situation. Stilltired is right...........the readings fall away and something happens within you and you realize certain things. Like, I am now also realizing that "this" is just never going to work out. Mine isn't a case of "Oh he'll go explore and see what the world has to offer and then suddenly realize it's me he wants to be with". This guy is 36 years old. He has the same patterns with me that he did in his 10 year marriage, only different is that I don't have his kids. This guy is addicted to the newness of a situation and that's where it ends and this is a reality I didn't want to face.
I read a meme yesterday on FB that said "A woman's loyalty is tested when a man has nothing. A man's loyalty is tested when he has everything". In my experience, this has been nothing but the truth. I'm the kind of person that hasn't cared if the guy had his life completely together or was in between job and had no material to offer etc. I looked at the heart and mind. That, however, I've come to learn, is a huge mistake for me. This guy has clung on to me for dear life since I was the only one around when no one else was, even his own family members, for the last 5 years. Suddenly, his family steps up and supports him, he gets where he wants, and then I get the cold shoulder and discarded. Granted, the guy keeps in contact once per week but it isn't because he just values me as a person or something. It's because things are still not 100% where he's located and very unstable. He really has opened my eyes this time around. I'm glad he has behaved the way he has for the past 7 months. Now there is NO doubt about what it's really been all about and it just confirmed what I always felt but wanted to ignore. Gotta trust your gut. I'm also tired of going broke trying to figure him out via psychics. I still feel so angry with myself doing these stupid things.
@Miss Philosopher...I so understand...first POI was like this. I held on for over three years..and we never were even in a relationship, just a weird attachment to one another. Looking back, all the warning signs were there, but I chose to ignore and kept getting readings that were promising me was going to turn into this whole new person and we were going to be so happy together. I feel really dumb when I look back too, and the hardest part is coming to terms that I was living in a fantasy world for a lot of that time. While I had moments of feeling reality hit, I overall kept thinking it would amount to something. The most depressing part of the whole journey was when I just realized one day, what the heck am I doing? Would a guy who really sees a future treat me like this?
I do think a lot of his issues were all him, and I have to remind myself not to take it personally, it could have been anyone who was involved with him that would have gotten treated the same way..it's just who he is.
When I was still in contact with him, I always had this nagging feeling in the back of my head that this was going to crash down on my and be a hard lesson for me, but I kept putting off the pain...months later, I'm still dealing with it..sometimes I really think about the whole experience and I almost start to cry.
The good thing is (like stilltired said) you do learn to trust yourself more, which is a good thing. The recent guy I was talking to (that also flopped lol) started exhibiting signs that he was also unstable, so I cut him loose right away. I thought to myself, I'm not going thru this again!
-
OMG EXACTLY MY POINT!
I get so frustrated every time I read with a new reader and feel more anxiety than before the reading !
That's why I really don't!!!
That's so crazy tho- how she got it accurate the first time but the second time was all wrong. I've seen this to be quite of a pattern amongst KEEN advisors also. I wonder what causes that.
Sorry for your experience and thanks for sharing!! We really gotta stick to the ones that work for us. Lol And get the reading sporadically, not so often. That's what I've learned.
-
Lol. Yeah next one I even think of getting with is going to have a job that he's been on for years, his own place that he's been in for years, his own vehicle. He can't be fresh out of a divorce or any relationship and he has to have been single for at least a year. He has to be my age or a bit older, as I will never be with another younger man. Although there was only a 5 year age gap, sometimes that can have a huge impact. Men seems to mature a lot slower than women emotionally so yeah, my age or older. I have like this laundry list now and a complete questionnaire. I may also end up doing background checks. I know that sounds insane but that's how damaged I now am. I have some serious trust problems.
-
Lol. Yeah next one I even think of getting with is going to have a job that he's been on for years, his own place that he's been in for years, his own vehicle. He can't be fresh out of a divorce or any relationship and he has to have been single for at least a year. He has to be my age or a bit older, as I will never be with another younger man. Although there was only a 5 year age gap, sometimes that can have a huge impact. Men seems to mature a lot slower than women emotionally so yeah, my age or older. I have like this laundry list now and a complete questionnaire. I may also end up doing background checks. I know that sounds insane but that's how damaged I now am. I have some serious trust problems.
No that doesn't sound insane. Nowadays I think it's a good idea to run a check on someone.
I agree. I am the type that gets way too emotionally attached, and fast, so before I invest any time or emotions into someone, from this point on, I want to make sure they are worth my time/energy.
-
I've learned that you can actually tell a lot about a man by his work ethics, rental history, and even credit score. This may sound ridiculous to many but here's why.
I don't focus too much on the credit score but if it's like 4 something, and that man is 35 years of age or older, that's a red flag. That shows irresponsibility and it's highly probable that man hops from place to place to live and also job to job which brings me to my next point. If you meet a man that has a huge employment history list and notice that he only holds jobs down for a few months, or even changes jobs yearly, he's probably also the same with relationships. Unstable, inconsistent, and constantly changing his moods, and his behaviors.
If you meet a man that moves a lot either from apartment to apartment, or other people's houses, etc......it's highly probable that man also doesn't hold down a job, and also won't hold down a relationship.
Certain behaviors and patterns bleed into ALL areas of life. I will use myself as an example. I've been on my job for 5 years. Prior to that I worked on that job for 3 years and I only changed jobs once I knew I had a new one. I responsibly made the switch and it was because I was miserable at the previous job. I've also worked since I was 15 years old and haven't siphoned off of any strangers or had any men take care of me. I'm loyal to my jobs the same as I am loyal in my relationships and friendships even. I've lived in the same apartment for 14 years. So you can see, I create stability and am able to be stable and loyal in relationships.
Men who hop around with job and home, will also relationship hop. There are men that will stay in the relationship for stability but, not hold down a steady job and will most likely cheat or break up with you often and then get back together so he can do his thing and it technically isn't "cheating".
These are all things I've learned through trial and error and a massive reflection and observation. Maybe I'm wrong. It's just stuff I noticed.
To add a bit to this, these type of unstable men are VERY VERY attracted to the stable females because we give them what they do not give to themselves. The problem is, they trample all over us because they get comfortable and feel safe and then they think they just be an absolute ass, do whatever, and us stable and consistent folks will just be there waiting, not realizing that we too have our limits.
-
There is nothing wrong with searching someone on Google and doing background checks on them. It is better to be safe than sorry, and I watched a series last year called "My Online Nightmare". People are hard to trust nowadays, lots of men living double lives and if someone wanted to check me online to see if I were genuine, I'd have no qualms about it. Only someone who has something to hide gets defensive of you doing background research of them.
-
@Star1: I completely agree. Only those who have much to hide would consider you doing a check on them as "insane". Lol
-
I've learned that you can actually tell a lot about a man by his work ethics, rental history, and even credit score. This may sound ridiculous to many but here's why.
I don't focus too much on the credit score but if it's like 4 something, and that man is 35 years of age or older, that's a red flag. That shows irresponsibility and it's highly probable that man hops from place to place to live and also job to job which brings me to my next point. If you meet a man that has a huge employment history list and notice that he only holds jobs down for a few months, or even changes jobs yearly, he's probably also the same with relationships. Unstable and constantly changing his moods, and his behaviors.
If you meet a man that moves a lot either from apartment to apartment, or other people's houses, etc......it's highly probable that man also doesn't hold down a job, and also won't hold down a relationship.
Certain behaviors and patterns bleed into ALL areas of life. I will use myself as an example. I've been on my job for 5 years. Prior to that I worked on that job for 3 years and I only changed jobs once I knew I had a new one. I responsibly made the switch and it was because I was miserable at the previous job. I've also worked since I was 15 years old and haven't siphoned off of any strangers or had any men take care of me. I'm loyal to my jobs the same as I am loyal in my relationships and friendships even. I've lived in the same apartment for 14 years. So you can see, I create stability and am able to be stable and loyal in relationships.
Men who hop around with job and home, will also relationship hop. There are men that will stay in the relationship for stability but, not hold down a steady job and will most likely cheat or break up with you often and then get back together so he can do his thing and it technically isn't "cheating".
These are all things I've learned through trial and error and a massive reflection and observation. Maybe I'm wrong. It's just stuff I noticed.
To add a bit to this, these type of unstable men are VERY VERY attracted to the stable females because we give them what they do not give to themselves. The problem is, they trample all over us because they get comfortable and feel safe and then they think they just be an absolute ass, do whatever, and us stable and consistent folks will just be there waiting, not realizing that we too have our limits.
To the extent these kinds of things are repeated patterns rather than one-offs, you're probably right. People do these things -- for the most part -- because of basic personality traits that are reflected in many areas of their lives.
There may be some exceptions of course ... sometimes when you start off with a bad break, it can be hard to recover and it spirals from there. Other jobs may lend themselves to transiency, like if you're a waitress, even at a high-end restaurant, you may move around more often than someone else would. But otherwise, yeah I agree.
-
@Star1: I completely agree. Only those who have much to hide would consider you doing a check on them as "insane". Lol
Yeah and your comment about looking at someone's track record of jobs and relationships is true. A guy who can't keep a job down shows he is quite unstable and not sensible. A mature guy is a man who works and is sensible, isn't constantly in and out of jobs and can be stable and sustainable.
-
@journalemuse: Yeah. That's what I mean. It has to be an actual pattern. I do understand that life happens and people lose jobs, places to live, etc. and may even have just one long difficult period. I'm just talking about those men that seem to never get their stuff straight past a certain age.
I have a few examples to share and after much reflection it's how I came to my conclusion.
1 of my exes that was with for 6 years back in my 20's was living with a much much older woman and told me she was his mother's friend. I had no reason to believe otherwise. I didn't know even a quarter of stuff back then that I know now. Nevertheless, he didn't work, he sold drugs. I then began to experience that he was the type that looked for women to use for money and materials. He got clothes, cars, jewelry, just all kinds of things. He never worked at all. He hopped from place to place to stay as well.
A male friend that I used to have, totally platonic, that I'm still friends with and have known for 9 years now, hops from job to job, place to place, and has tons of relationships that don't last. It isn't because he's a player though. It's because he's simply too lazy to put the proper efforts into anything.
Another of my exes did work his ass off. BUT, he also hopped from job to job because he demanded more money for his experience. He also hopped from home to home and even state to state for work. He is married, however, he cheats on his wife.
My current ex is 36 years old. He was married for 10 years with 2 kids. He didn't hold down a job for long the entire time he was married. He also cheated on his wife several times. She also cheated on him but she worked her ass off and still does. As long as I've know him, since 2011, and have been involved with him on the relationship area for the last 5 years, he's been very inconsistent, didn't hold down jobs for long at all, and cheated (not sexually) but always needed constant attention and his "affairs" never last more than a month or two. He's very codependent and very lazy. His credit score is 483. He now hops from room to room in another state, and will hop from job to job. His mother financially supports him and has been for the past 7 months so she's enabling his laziness. He will never have stability without a woman of some sort.
So you see, these aren't cases of life just happening, rather behavioral patterns that bleed into all areas of their lives and they do nothing to change it, most likely because they haven't taken the time to see their own patterns.
-
@Stilltired: I have lacked common sense for the majority of my life apparently. Lol. These are realizations and conclusions I've come to since dealing with this current situation. So I guess it wasn't all for not. Good lessons for me. Lol.
-
@Stilltired: I actually feel the same way. I've never been married. The thought of being married makes me feel trapped and suffocated. I won't say I'm a commitment phobe because I'm totally committed to whatever relationship I'm in. I think I just feel like I need an easy exit route just in case for whatever reason it doesn't work out. Maybe that's why I keep attracting men that have commitment problems. Like attracts like. I'm not a cheater, but yeah, I have an issue with the marriage thing, not so much the relationship thing though.
I don't want a man to take care of me because that gives him control over me and my life. I want to keep control of my own life. I want an actual equal partner where I'm not taking care of him and he's not taking care of me but we take care of each other in whatever ways and we work as a team. Maybe I'm unrealistic. I don't know.
-
I've learned that you can actually tell a lot about a man by his work ethics, rental history, and even credit score. This may sound ridiculous to many but here's why.
I don't focus too much on the credit score but if it's like 4 something, and that man is 35 years of age or older, that's a red flag. That shows irresponsibility and it's highly probable that man hops from place to place to live and also job to job which brings me to my next point. If you meet a man that has a huge employment history list and notice that he only holds jobs down for a few months, or even changes jobs yearly, he's probably also the same with relationships. Unstable, inconsistent, and constantly changing his moods, and his behaviors.
If you meet a man that moves a lot either from apartment to apartment, or other people's houses, etc......it's highly probable that man also doesn't hold down a job, and also won't hold down a relationship.
Certain behaviors and patterns bleed into ALL areas of life. I will use myself as an example. I've been on my job for 5 years. Prior to that I worked on that job for 3 years and I only changed jobs once I knew I had a new one. I responsibly made the switch and it was because I was miserable at the previous job. I've also worked since I was 15 years old and haven't siphoned off of any strangers or had any men take care of me. I'm loyal to my jobs the same as I am loyal in my relationships and friendships even. I've lived in the same apartment for 14 years. So you can see, I create stability and am able to be stable and loyal in relationships.
Men who hop around with job and home, will also relationship hop. There are men that will stay in the relationship for stability but, not hold down a steady job and will most likely cheat or break up with you often and then get back together so he can do his thing and it technically isn't "cheating".
These are all things I've learned through trial and error and a massive reflection and observation. Maybe I'm wrong. It's just stuff I noticed.
To add a bit to this, these type of unstable men are VERY VERY attracted to the stable females because we give them what they do not give to themselves. The problem is, they trample all over us because they get comfortable and feel safe and then they think they just be an absolute ass, do whatever, and us stable and consistent folks will just be there waiting, not realizing that we too have our limits.
This is genius and I agree with this 100%.
-
just curious, why do you think some can get psychic readings and take them with a grain of salt, etc..and others seem to get so addicted to them?
I'm sure there are people out there (probably not too many of us on this board lol) that have gotten a psychic reading or two and when they realized it was all BS, just stopped getting them and moved on with life...and yet some of us call for years still hanging on to hope? I guess it depends on what type of personality you have..
-
just curious, why do you think some can get psychic readings and take them with a grain of salt, etc..and others seem to get so addicted to them?
I'm sure there are people out there (probably not too many of us on this board lol) that have gotten a psychic reading or two and when they realized it was all BS, just stopped getting them and moved on with life...and yet some of us call for years still hanging on to hope? I guess it depends on what type of personality you have..
Everyone's different. Some people are addicted, some have a "hey ho" mentality. Some ladies are in a weaker place, some women on here are tough cookies. Some ladies are willing to wait 5, 10, 20+ years, some women give themselves a time limit like 6 months/year max.
-
I agree with Star1 again.
My pattern is this: When a thing first begins happening, in a bad way, I'm like in a state of shock. I get a reading and I live by it. I continue to do this, especially when they see changes for the better, even if it is only temporary. Somehow, I then "get used to" said behavioral patterns, when really, I should have cut that shit off immediately, but for whatever, reason, I don't. I continue in this pattern of readings, believing, hoping, not because I'm weak, but because I'm hopeful and mostly an optimist. But then, a point comes, to where, I get tired of the cycles, patterns, etc. and then I begin taking the readings with a grain of salt and I set a timeline for myself to when I'm going to just be done and then I reach the end of said timeline and don't see any changes and then ......I just don't have readings anymore or they are only like once every few years for shits and giggles............until the next shitty situation occurs LOL. Rinse and repeat.
I do also think it has to do with personality type. For some personalities, yeah they have a zero tolerance thing going on and first time you screw up, you're done lol. (My son is like that). Others, here are more sensitive and understanding and compassionate and those traits tend to be the very traits that keep them holding on for longer but not like 5 10 years. They will usually get tired and set timelines and that's it. Then you have those that most likely suffer from self esteem issues and those are usually the ones you will find holding on for decades. They call it love, and maybe it is, but there's more to it then that. They never get to a point where they feel or KNOW they deserve something better.
That's just my take on it.
-
I agree with Star1 again.
My pattern is this: When a thing first begins happening, in a bad way, I'm like in a state of shock. I get a reading and I live by it. I continue to do this, especially when they see changes for the better, even if it is only temporary. Somehow, I then "get used to" said behavioral patterns, when really, I should have cut that shit off immediately, but for whatever, reason, I don't. I continue in this pattern of readings, believing, hoping, not because I'm weak, but because I'm hopeful and mostly an optimist. But then, a point comes, to where, I get tired of the cycles, patterns, etc. and then I begin taking the readings with a grain of salt and I set a timeline for myself to when I'm going to just be done and then I reach the end of said timeline and don't see any changes and then ......I just don't have readings anymore or they are only like once every few years for shits and giggles............until the next shitty situation occurs LOL. Rinse and repeat.
I do also think it has to do with personality type. For some personalities, yeah they have a zero tolerance thing going on and first time you screw up, you're done lol. (My son is like that). Others, here are more sensitive and understanding and compassionate and those traits tend to be the very traits that keep them holding on for longer but not like 5 10 years. They will usually get tired and set timelines and that's it. Then you have those that most likely suffer from self esteem issues and those are usually the ones you will find holding on for decades. They call it love, and maybe it is, but there's more to it then that. They never get to a point where they feel or KNOW they deserve something better.
That's just my take on it.
Someone said that when a reader tells you good news, it's been proven that dopamine releases in the brain when we hear something amazing like the ex is coming back, and that's what causes some of the addiction because people chase to get that high again. That's why people when they hear bad news, keep getting readings until they hear something that they like to "comfort" them.
I'm quite weird as a person I just impulsively decide one day that enough is enough and I'm done. Like with the first POI, I didn't think I'd get over him and one day I really had had enough and decided that that was it.
-
Man I need some of your impulsiveness. It would do me well. Please share. Lol
-
Man I need some of your impulsiveness. It would do me well. Please share. Lol
Lol ;D
-
star1 you are right looking at the reviews on keen these psychics get five star not because of there predictions but it make you feel good.
(She didn't end chat on me!! That means a lot! She put my mind at ease even though the whole situation is still rather upsetting. Very good, patient advisor! Thank you so much!! ) This reviews on Keen are very common.
-
star1 you are right looking at the reviews on keen these psychics get five star not because of there predictions but it make you feel good.
(She didn't end chat on me!! That means a lot! She put my mind at ease even though the whole situation is still rather upsetting. Very good, patient advisor! Thank you so much!! ) This reviews on Keen are very common.
Yeah the thing most people do is post a review after the reading when they're on the "high". But not wait until preds have passed to post a review.
-
Yeah. I only wait until something comes to pass before I leave a review. And it can't be something small like one contact or something. It has to be something bigger than that. That's why you won't find many reviews from me anywhere other than on three of them. lol.
-
Yeah. I only wait until something comes to pass before I leave a review. And it can't be something small like one contact or something. It has to be something bigger than that. That's why you won't find many reviews from me anywhere other than on three of them. lol.
Lol I'm the idiot that leaves a review right after a reading ::) I won't in future because people like Eamon who tell people what they want to hear and give the same readings to people... I left him a review thinking he was really good and found that out :-\
-
I have a strong sense of duty and loyalty, so I can stick things out and be patient as long as I think the situation requires that. And I can be very compassionate forgiving. But once a person crosses the wrong line with me, I'm done and there's no going back. It's very quick. It's just a matter of how I see someone. If I bond with a person to the point that I see them as kin, I will do anything for them. If they break that bond, or I see good reason to break it, I am done and it's very quick. But I can be blind sometimes about the need to break it.
The problem with my ex was he turned out to be VERY two faced. He acted one way with me, and a different way with other people. I didn't see it at first, and the readers didn't either. And then if he acted like a jerk, they would say that's not really how he feels. I could have turned my back on it all very early on, and I wanted to badly...I remember getting readings very soon after we broke up, where I'd say, you know what I've had enough of this, I'm just going to tell him off and be done with it. And they would talk me out of it, or give me advice on what to say. THAT was where it all went wrong. I stopped acting on my own volition and followed their advice.
Predictions are one thing, advice is another, and when they give advice they overstep big time. They can be right on a lot of things from a psychic perspective, but then they throw some advice in and it's hard to set that aside as their personal opinion. I thought, well, if they can describe my ex so well and see what he is like and what happened between us, then they are giving me this advice for a reason. It all seemed very plausible. It still seems plausible, given what I knew at the time. I just didn't have the whole picture, which is what I was calling psychics for, and they failed to give me the information I needed.
just curious, why do you think some can get psychic readings and take them with a grain of salt, etc..and others seem to get so addicted to them?
I'm sure there are people out there (probably not too many of us on this board lol) that have gotten a psychic reading or two and when they realized it was all BS, just stopped getting them and moved on with life...and yet some of us call for years still hanging on to hope? I guess it depends on what type of personality you have..
The truth sets us free. When you're not getting the truth, it creates an addiction. It sets up a false reality that has to be fed constantly to keep it alive. A lie is like a parasite that keeps draining your energy. One way or another, people who keep hanging on are not getting the truth. It may be that the readers are not giving them the truth...or it may be that the readers are giving them the truth but they are not seeing it, or someone in their life is lying to them so they don't see it. Most often, what readers say is such a convoluted mix or truth and lies that it gets hard to sort out the nuggets of truth. But somehow or another, the truth is not getting through.
I don't believe anyone really takes readings with a grain of salt. I mean people who can genuinely do that, are not going to have enough interest to bother getting readings more than once or twice on a whim. If a person is interested enough to make it a habit, and they take care to pick and choose which readers they use, they want to hear something relevant, something meaningful.
When I first started getting readings on this guy, if I heard anything I didn't want to hear, I'd become argumentative and put the phone down. "How dare they tell me anything remotely negative about him, they have no place to say that".. The reason why I'm not minding hearing good or bad news either way now, is because I learned that you cannot hide from the truth forever. You cannot polish a turd. Weirdly for me now, the more negative news seems realistic and when I get positive readings, I sometimes can feel angry with readers or like they're not being realistic. I won't argue with a reader, I'll just feel annoyed after the call and think to myself how unrealistic they're being. But yes - I was once the crazy lady who put the phone down on people.
-
I was the opposite because I argued with the fairytale stuff. I never truly believed a word of it. I just couldn't dismiss it either because how could they all be wrong, and only me who was right? It was intimidating. I gave them the benefit of the doubt, in a very protracted suspension of disbelief.
The ones who were more negative, could have helped me if they had been more specific. But they were very general, or short, whereas the more positive readers were much more detailed and specific.
See that's the issue.. Even when they give bad news, most of the time it's so generic that (just because they're giving bad news) it doesn't mean to say that they're genuine.
-
I have a strong sense of duty and loyalty, so I can stick things out and be patient as long as I think the situation requires that. And I can be very compassionate forgiving. But once a person crosses the wrong line with me, I'm done and there's no going back. It's very quick. It's just a matter of how I see someone. If I bond with a person to the point that I see them as kin, I will do anything for them. If they break that bond, or I see good reason to break it, I am done and it's very quick. But I can be blind sometimes about the need to break it.
The problem with my ex was he turned out to be VERY two faced. He acted one way with me, and a different way with other people. I didn't see it at first, and the readers didn't either. And then if he acted like a jerk, they would say that's not really how he feels. I could have turned my back on it all very early on, and I wanted to badly...I remember getting readings very soon after we broke up, where I'd say, you know what I've had enough of this, I'm just going to tell him off and be done with it. And they would talk me out of it, or give me advice on what to say. THAT was where it all went wrong. I stopped acting on my own volition and followed their advice.
Predictions are one thing, advice is another, and when they give advice they overstep big time. They can be right on a lot of things from a psychic perspective, but then they throw some advice in and it's hard to set that aside as their personal opinion. I thought, well, if they can describe my ex so well and see what he is like and what happened between us, then they are giving me this advice for a reason. It all seemed very plausible. It still seems plausible, given what I knew at the time. I just didn't have the whole picture, which is what I was calling psychics for, and they failed to give me the information I needed.
just curious, why do you think some can get psychic readings and take them with a grain of salt, etc..and others seem to get so addicted to them?
I'm sure there are people out there (probably not too many of us on this board lol) that have gotten a psychic reading or two and when they realized it was all BS, just stopped getting them and moved on with life...and yet some of us call for years still hanging on to hope? I guess it depends on what type of personality you have..
The truth sets us free. When you're not getting the truth, it creates an addiction. It sets up a false reality that has to be fed constantly to keep it alive. A lie is like a parasite that keeps draining your energy. One way or another, people who keep hanging on are not getting the truth. It may be that the readers are not giving them the truth...or it may be that the readers are giving them the truth but they are not seeing it, or someone in their life is lying to them so they don't see it. Most often, what readers say is such a convoluted mix or truth and lies that it gets hard to sort out the nuggets of truth. But somehow or another, the truth is not getting through.
I don't believe anyone really takes readings with a grain of salt. I mean people who can genuinely do that, are not going to have enough interest to bother getting readings more than once or twice on a whim. If a person is interested enough to make it a habit, and they take care to pick and choose which readers they use, they want to hear something relevant, something meaningful.
brilliant! You said it much better than I ever could!