Relationship Psychology Discussions > The Vent

i feel dead inside

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Star_01:
Sorry to hear that you're going through this.

I know the feeling of feeling confused and having a bad reading then worrying about what they said and if it's true with your thoughts racing.

Remember that with all the manifesting and readers nothing can control the real outcome and you have to say to yourself that if this man is supposed to be for you then he will and if he sadly isn't then this time 6 months, next year, or 2 years you will have most likely began moving on and find someone who was meant for you and won't have you calling readers. You'll feel secure and know where you stand and at least you're beginning to recgonise that these readings are unhealthy and fudge up your head and finances.

maggs30:
I am were you are and its a really shirty place. I know my insecurities are playing a big part in my bf being distant and I'm trying so hard to stop them. I started my new job today... Away from him and I binged bad. And I know a lot has to do with the pressure I caused on him when he's already under so much. I'm trying to give it up to God and its so damn hard. Just know you can reach out if you feel like breaking.

SomethingBetter:
Feel better.

Make sure you are paying St. Martha and Santisima Muerte properly. Santisima will take away just as easily as she gives.

kdspirited:
Winterelf. It looks like we have this fact in common that we work with our POI's. Just remember you are more important than anything or anyone. I know its easier said than done but remember that your POI has no idea what you are going through. He is just going about his life no torment nothing. You deserve more than that. You deserve your own peace of mind. I ask myself why am I wanting this person in my life so bad when he is doing absolutely nothing to be close to me. Can you imagine if the scenario was reversed and your POI was meditating for you to come back. You would not stop your life or change a darn thing. Take care of yourself. You are the most important person in this equation. Trust yourself and your gut before you trust any person or psychic.

Focus on you and go on a date even if it is to take your mind of our POI. YOu never know.

sanshine:
WinterElf,

my heart so goes out to you. The psychic at the fair was completely unethical in pushing for the reading in the first place - so to me that completely voids anything that she would have to say. Theres a karmic
payback for her there. She took your kindness, generosity, sensitivity and vulnerability for a ride for cash - deeply not OK!

I can also really relate to the feeling dead part, love is such a beautiful energy state to be in that its hard to feel really joyful when the person that you flow with is not stable with it. I was in a relationship with
someone for 5 years who was so unstable, coming and going and generally being unclear and dishonest, those behaviors threw me into terrible doubt about myself. The flow of love was so huge that I couldnt
understand why this wouldnt be so important to him. I got caught off balance and spent way too much money, time and emotional resources (and anxiety and depression
were side saddle in all of this too) on something/one that couldnt be resolved  - except inside of me and I resisted that I had to be responsible for myself in this.

I started working with a healer because I needed help to hold a gentle loving place for me to settle and untangle the mess. I am extremely sensitive, intuitive and emotionally mature and I wasnt fully aware of it, let alone
honoring it in any relationship. Just knowing that fact made things a lot more peaceful for me. Most people dont even see how sensitive I am. And I bet a lot of people on this board are a lot more sensitive than most.

It sounds like all of the manifesting work you are doing helped raise your vibration and keep it stable inside, so get back to that and keep holding your energy high and protected - its such an energetic mess
out there.

hugs to you WinterElf

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