Thank you so much for all your input, ladies! I feel like I agree with everyone agghh! I really like the idea that I'm only tempted to reach out to settle my own anxiety arising from waiting- which is true. I guess the absolute strongest thing to do is not reach out at all and make peace with the idea he may never text me. At the same time I like the idea of just finding out he's not "scared" or whatever- he's just a jerk- and letting go in a way I haven't been able to yet.
Luckystar- here's the breakdown. On the heels of our own traumatic breakups, he and I both joined a dating site and "met" that way. We texted for like nine months and continuously flaked on each other- when one was ready to be brave - the other would have second thoughts. When we finally met it was amazing. He lives far so he drove two hours to my house and spent the whole weekend with me- which neither of us expected. He was like immediately all about it. He would say things like "that's an us thing" and "I wanna drive across the whole country with you" and "I don't care what we do I just wanna be with you that's all I care about" and "well as long as you like my hair that's all that matters" etc. introduced me to everyone in his life, family friends boss. We spent weekends with each other. We started to have some tension surrounding him making plans to see me one weekend and then going to his friends cabin instead without telling me. Then he got flakey with texts and his mom went into the hospital with a heart issue- he started telling me he was getting stressed with life and it was hard having his weekends eaten up- which I got. I was never demanding of his time I just wanted a heads up if he wasnt coming up so I could make my own plans. One day after he ignored my text for like a whole day I said "can you tell me what's going on". He said "I don't feel committted to a relationship but I LOVE the time we spend together and I like you a lot" I wasn't sure if that meant he wanted a relationship eventually or not. I asked him to call me about it sometime soon. He said sure but I could tell in the routine texting of the following days he was shy about it and probably not going to call. What I said was scary, I'll admit. I said "well I need to decide if I want to keep seeing you" and he said "but I want to keep talking to you and seeing you!" And I said "well call me so I can figure out where your head is at and see if I want that too." A couple days later I was impatient and texted him "how about tonight" and when he didn't respond by that night, I blocked him on social media. He probably thinks I don't want to hear from him but he's all I think about
