Relationship Psychology Discussions > The Vent
Question
Seeker:
Sounds like it was a FWB situation, you wound up getting feelings for more and he didn't. Really sorry that happened. Like others have said, erasing him and moving on is the best thing you can do.
I've been in your shoes, but worse. Mine was a real love relationship. Long story short, she MARRIED someone else. First thing I did was delete everything connected to her. This helped me get over it faster, but it WAS somebody I loved so it didn't happen overnight. Funny thing is, now this is a person I wouldn't even want today, she wouldn't even be my type and realizing that really helped in the long run. So personal evolution has a strong impact on our past outlook and can help us heal or affirm our position.
As for not trying online dating, as a woman, I don't see the intimidation. That online dating field is totally slanted in your favor. There are a ton more men than women there, and men pretty much always make the first move. You'll have tons to choose from. Even women considered "the least attractive" get offers. I would definitely consider it in the future if I were you. I say future though because you're not ready to be dating right now. You need to get 100% over this situation. It's never a good idea to date when you're not 100% through a current situation, someone usually winds up getting hurt and it tends to be the new person getting hit with all your past baggage.
mystery123:
Thank you so much everyone! I needed to hear all of this. Yea, I always knew what his intentions were so he is not a bad person, but I guess I was hoping for the unexpected. His behavior would sweeten tremendously on and off and then with readers saying he likes you, I thought a miracle would happen. Guess not.
@sawthelight- yea that was in April, aries, fairie moon and sweethearts tarot asked me to let go as they dont see anything.. but we again got back together for two weeks in june so I disregarded their reading. When i read with them in August September then they said the opposite— he likes you and will come forward. So I started hoping for that.
But you all are right, I need to respect myself more to let him go. I should have known better then and now, but I definitely deserve better. Not this kind of back and forth. And it’s also a good point to look at myself and see what do i want. Why and how did I get into this place. Why would I fall in love with someone who doesn’t want me and have made it clear several times. I need to stand up for myself. I don’t need to beg for a relationship.
I need to take a break or stop taking readings especially when I know that they don’t read me but someone else.
I can’t thank you guys enough!!! Nothing was rude or anything, i sincerely needed someone to shake me, wake me up and slap me out of it. I will watch that video as well and maybe try online dating once I feel healed from this situation.
I will come back to it whenever repeating patterns...so thank you all again! and now feel like I am not alone and I can do this!! I need to stop living in my head and in my imaginary “relationship”
bluebelle:
aww good luck to you. It's a hard realization. One never knows what the future holds, but in the meantime, live your life and move ahead as best as possible. :D
mystery123:
Thank you!!
sawthelight:
--- Quote from: mystery123 on October 18, 2017, 12:05:35 PM ---Thank you so much everyone! I needed to hear all of this. Yea, I always knew what his intentions were so he is not a bad person, but I guess I was hoping for the unexpected. His behavior would sweeten tremendously on and off and then with readers saying he likes you, I thought a miracle would happen. Guess not.
@sawthelight- yea that was in April, aries, fairie moon and sweethearts tarot asked me to let go as they dont see anything.. but we again got back together for two weeks in june so I disregarded their reading. When i read with them in August September then they said the opposite— he likes you and will come forward. So I started hoping for that.
But you all are right, I need to respect myself more to let him go. I should have known better then and now, but I definitely deserve better. Not this kind of back and forth. And it’s also a good point to look at myself and see what do i want. Why and how did I get into this place. Why would I fall in love with someone who doesn’t want me and have made it clear several times. I need to stand up for myself. I don’t need to beg for a relationship.
I need to take a break or stop taking readings especially when I know that they don’t read me but someone else.
I can’t thank you guys enough!!! Nothing was rude or anything, i sincerely needed someone to shake me, wake me up and slap me out of it. I will watch that video as well and maybe try online dating once I feel healed from this situation.
I will come back to it whenever repeating patterns...so thank you all again! and now feel like I am not alone and I can do this!! I need to stop living in my head and in my imaginary “relationship”
--- End quote ---
I have been where you are...and I always hoped things would change. they did a bit, but never enough, and it was only way after I moved ahead, that I realized I'm glad things didn't work out the way I wanted them to at the time, because something so much better was around the corner. Sound corny and cheesy, but it's true!
You ever hear the expression, "don't make someone a priority when they only make you an option"...that's my motto in life.
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