Relationship Psychology Discussions > The Vent
Question
mystery123:
I am sorry it's not a psychic or reading related question but I didn't know where else to ask this as I can't discuss it with any of my girlfriends or family..
How do you guys deal with when you see your POI with someone else? Or you know he has chosen someone else over you? how do you deal with the pain?
I truly want to let go now. I am tired of feeling hurt and trapped in this emotion. For once I want to feel free of him, his thoughts, and be with someone who wants me and cares for me. It's almost like I am friends with the pain of rejection now, but I can't stop hoping for him to come back. How do I stop hoping?
The idea of going out and meeting new people right now is scary and I am not even sure how to do that -- not an extrovert. I can't do online dating- just too intimidating for me.
All the readers said he will come forward, travel more, be more open (Yona, Aries, Dawn, Christina, and a bunch--and maybe my fault for getting so many readings). This past weekend i saw he is traveling but to meet this other girl he liked which he told me about too. So yea they picked up his activities but not for me?! which means his feelings are also not for me.. And regardless of this girl he has never committed to me in two years, he has been fine with "sleepovers" but that's it, I don't know why I fell in love with such a jerk. It's my mistake to let this happen and keep myself hoping despite of what was happening. So I really want to open my eyes to reality and stop living in the psychic world where they tell me that he likes me.
I can't do this anymore, in 28 years this is the first time I feel crippled.. any advice on how to let go of pain, move on for good would be great?
I have read plenty of articles online but seeking some real person advice since I feel I know you guys! Thanks!
Universal9:
It is difficult yes. And it is easier said than done, but I consider myself rather strong mentally in this aspect, even though I dont know why he is still on the mind (even if so negatively).
Why dont you please think like this? He cares about someone else, he chose someone else, he wants her not me, he cares how she feels not how I feel!...
If he places importance on another woman over me, that is when the doors are permanently closed off from your end too.
I dont like alphafemale in general coz her prediction on a simple immediate career Q didnt manifest, but she had once told me that I wont let him behave the way he does, and will not tolerate the nonsense- she was so right on that one.
When he was willing to demote me down to only "friends", and became defensive on being just that, I severed all forms of contact with him. I put my foot down, and did not allow the nonsensical behaviour from him. By friends, he could have had the option of having many women present in his life as "friends" without having to commit. Why would I have allowed that?
That said, is he not on my mind? He is, sadly, but I do not allow positive thoughts i.e. all I think about is he cares about someone else (which I suspect he does), he does not think highly enough of me to pursue me (and thats his choice).
If he has to be in my mind without my control for the type of connection it is, I will ensure I try best to drive him away, by thinking negative. Why allow myself to be tortured by this feeling of him pursuing someone else?..
sodapopcharm:
He was in it for sex. Why would he buy the cow if he was always able to get the milk for free? You deserve better. Why would you want a man who doesn’t want you? What is it really, that you like/love about him?
As hard as it may be, force yourself to meet other people. If you really want to move on from this guy, do whatever it takes even if it’s a drag. Online dating (and trying other ways to meet people) cannot be as bad as being stuck on someone who doesn’t want you.
sawthelight:
Cut off all contact as much as you can...
I remember reading some posts of yours and I thought you said a lot of readers gave you negative outcomes with this guy?
Seriously, though I’m so sorry you are going through this, just look ahead and not back. No contact is the only way.
Kate:
--- Quote from: sawthelight on October 18, 2017, 10:40:15 AM ---Cut off all contact as much as you can...
I remember reading some posts of yours and I thought you said a lot of readers gave you negative outcomes with this guy?
Seriously, though I’m so sorry you are going through this, just look ahead and not back. No contact is the only way.
--- End quote ---
I actually recommend watching Matthew Hussey's videos -
Start here "UNREQUITED LOVE IS BULLS**T!"
https://web.facebook.com/CoachMatthewHussey/videos/1496088253743573/?_rdc=1&_rdr
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