Author Topic: Goodbye  (Read 5315 times)

Offline HornetKick

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #30 on: October 10, 2017, 03:38:11 PM »
That's a very interesting story. Thank you for sharing that!

The way I look at it, the universe only sends the signs, whether the outcome turns out good or bad is a separate matter unless the signs themselves included pieces of the outcome in which case that gives us a chance to prepare. Most of the time, signs are too subtle or too unclear in intent for us to prepare so we receive the signs without knowing how it will all end up or what to do in the meantime.

One thing I've come to accept about life is that there are no real accidents. Everything that happens is in concert with the course of your life. We may not like the circumstances or the outcomes but most of that is simply ego driven where we think we "deserve" something "more" or "better" and then we expect the universe to give it to us. I myself am very much guilty of that flaw, but I'm improving daily.

Since I have no desire to contact my POI with my message left unanswered, this can't end badly for me. If she never answers I will be fine without her. Besides, if you've spent time around a person who made a move on you and you open up tell them how you feel and all they can do is lurk your posts every day online and never speak, it's pretty obvious something isn't quite right with that person as that's not at all a normal thing to do.

Signs are sooooooo objective. I'm even starting to wean myself of using that kind of lingo anymore. Our interpretation of signs is a whole other story altogether. You're last comment is not necessarily true. I do get what you're saying though that if you've told someone how you feel and they don't reciprocate, then you really do have to look at it as if that's your answer or their lack of an answer means they are not interested, but Social Media is the new normal and lurking is what many people do now in this day and age.

Offline Seeker

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #31 on: October 10, 2017, 04:06:15 PM »
The non-reciprocation I can understand, it's the accepting the connection invite, lurking, reading, and liking of posts in this type of circumstance that comes across as very bizarre to me. What makes it even more bizarre is that if when I checked her activity I noticed that in all the years she's been there she has never liked (or even commented) on anything besides my post, and at that site you can't erase your activity history there and the history goes all the way back to the day you sign up.

If that's the new normal I find that pretty scary. It would be like, if I saw you and turned you down (didn't reply to message) but kept hanging around you every day (lurking), listening to your conversations (reading), and even clapping when you say something I dig (hitting the like button), lol.

I could never do any of those things without feeling ultra weird.

If she has nothing to say ever I'm sure she'll disappear eventually.

Offline Seeker

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #32 on: October 10, 2017, 04:35:53 PM »
Signs are sooooooo objective. I'm even starting to wean myself of using that kind of lingo anymore. Our interpretation of signs is a whole other story altogether.

One of the things I learned from Hans Wilhelm was that each of our life paths are uniquely tailored to us individually. Considering that, I can think of times in my life where signs popped up and when I communicated them to other people they simply thought I was crazy... but, then the thing the signs were attached to came to fruition. So I think in that regard the signs are subjective because they are to be interpreted by the individual and others may not interpret them the same way as the person receiving them because, well, the message isn't meant for them.

I've only ever had signs this intense in my entire life before with a previous relationship. It was 6 months of that person's name popping up constantly, daily, everywhere until the day she showed up and we got together. I was deeply in love with that woman. I don't feel that same way about this POI, but I definitely have feelings there. Not saying that the "destined" outcome with this POI is to be like the other situation, but it's worth noting.

Offline HornetKick

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #33 on: October 10, 2017, 04:52:39 PM »
No, I meant our own interpretation of the signs, not what a friend or reader sees. If readers can misinterpret signs, we can too, especially if it's our own life. I've had plenty of signs or thought that these were signs giving me affirmations, but then nothing come from it but heartache.

Personally, I’m just starting to renege on the whole sign outlook altogether. I can’t read the damn things, don’t know what they are saying, don’t know if it’s going to happen or not, can’t hear what the universe is giving me. I’m starting to believe it’s another ploy we’ve bought into, like the soulmate dilemma or the American dream, that sort of thing.

Offline HornetKick

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #34 on: October 10, 2017, 06:12:45 PM »
Yes, that is the key term: practical.

Offline Seeker

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #35 on: October 10, 2017, 06:14:56 PM »
No, I meant our own interpretation of the signs, not what a friend or reader sees. If readers can misinterpret signs, we can too, especially if it's our own life. I've had plenty of signs or thought that these were signs giving me affirmations, but then nothing come from it but heartache.

Certainly. I think the Psychic industry is rich in big part because of that. Fortunately for me I've only spent about $20-$25 on psychics all of these years, so for the most part I've been able to interpret a great deal on my own, but in these two cases (one of them being the current) it was weird enough for me to entertain an outside psychic perspective.

Offline sawthelight

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #36 on: October 10, 2017, 06:26:02 PM »
The non-reciprocation I can understand, it's the accepting the connection invite, lurking, reading, and liking of posts in this type of circumstance that comes across as very bizarre to me. What makes it even more bizarre is that if when I checked her activity I noticed that in all the years she's been there she has never liked (or even commented) on anything besides my post, and at that site you can't erase your activity history there and the history goes all the way back to the day you sign up.

If that's the new normal I find that pretty scary. It would be like, if I saw you and turned you down (didn't reply to message) but kept hanging around you every day (lurking), listening to your conversations (reading), and even clapping when you say something I dig (hitting the like button), lol.

I could never do any of those things without feeling ultra weird.

If she has nothing to say ever I'm sure she'll disappear eventually.

Well I can tell you, just from my own experience, that I have lurked on other people's FB, social media etc, and had no interest in them.  in my case, it's just boredom, honestly lol.  Of course, that's just me and I don't know what your POI is thinking.  And i agree it's very strange that she's had no activity other than lurking around your stuff  :o
« Last Edit: October 10, 2017, 06:27:36 PM by sawthelight »

Offline Seeker

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #37 on: October 10, 2017, 06:38:32 PM »
The non-reciprocation I can understand, it's the accepting the connection invite, lurking, reading, and liking of posts in this type of circumstance that comes across as very bizarre to me. What makes it even more bizarre is that if when I checked her activity I noticed that in all the years she's been there she has never liked (or even commented) on anything besides my post, and at that site you can't erase your activity history there and the history goes all the way back to the day you sign up.

If that's the new normal I find that pretty scary. It would be like, if I saw you and turned you down (didn't reply to message) but kept hanging around you every day (lurking), listening to your conversations (reading), and even clapping when you say something I dig (hitting the like button), lol.

I could never do any of those things without feeling ultra weird.

If she has nothing to say ever I'm sure she'll disappear eventually.

Well I can tell you, just from my own experience, that I have lurked on other people's FB, social media etc, and had no interest in them.  in my case, it's just boredom, honestly lol.

We all do that. I do it. You go on a site, you look around at what people are doing, that's totally normal. But the question is, did you do that with someone who opened up to you and you didn't reply but instead just accepted an invite to connect and kept hanging around lurking, reading, and liking that person's posts every day but not saying anything?

Just lurking is fine and totally normal to do, but it's doing it after the specific condition of being opened up to that changes the dynamic because that's going to make the other person puzzled as to what the point of it is. Then you throw in the fact of having no other activity and it gets even stranger.

Offline sawthelight

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #38 on: October 10, 2017, 06:45:45 PM »
The non-reciprocation I can understand, it's the accepting the connection invite, lurking, reading, and liking of posts in this type of circumstance that comes across as very bizarre to me. What makes it even more bizarre is that if when I checked her activity I noticed that in all the years she's been there she has never liked (or even commented) on anything besides my post, and at that site you can't erase your activity history there and the history goes all the way back to the day you sign up.

If that's the new normal I find that pretty scary. It would be like, if I saw you and turned you down (didn't reply to message) but kept hanging around you every day (lurking), listening to your conversations (reading), and even clapping when you say something I dig (hitting the like button), lol.

I could never do any of those things without feeling ultra weird.

If she has nothing to say ever I'm sure she'll disappear eventually.

Well I can tell you, just from my own experience, that I have lurked on other people's FB, social media etc, and had no interest in them.  in my case, it's just boredom, honestly lol.

We all do that. I do it. You go on a site, you look around at what people are doing, that's totally normal. But the question is, did you do that with someone who opened up to you and you didn't reply but instead just accepted an invite to connect and kept hanging around lurking, reading, and liking that person's posts every day but not saying anything?

Just lurking is fine and totally normal to do, but it's doing it after the specific condition of being opened up to that changes the dynamic because that's going to make the other person puzzled as to what the point of it is. Then you throw in the fact of having no other activity and it gets even stranger.

Yea, that's extremely bizarre, I agree. 

Offline njlady

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Re: Goodbye
« Reply #39 on: April 11, 2018, 05:12:03 PM »
I'd be careful of a lot of advice from Steve Harvey, a lot of it is questionable and rooted in playing on the emotions of desperate or deeply discouraged women. One also has to question the deeply misandric slants he takes, and although I realize he is targeting a female audience misandry certainly won't help the female-male dynamic as it just breeds into women the nonsense idea that men are less than them and other vitriol.

That said, I agree with this one bit of his, however before I throw the relationship away I would ask the guy straight up what the deal is. What women don't often realize is because men and women view things in differing ways a man may not recognize that at a specific moment something is important to a woman and that you were expecting a different outcome than the one the man provided you. I'm sure lots of relationships have broken up for just that one reason alone. If the woman verbalizes it (i.e. "why haven't you introduced me to your family?") and he still doesn't do it, then at that point you know something is wrong.

I was going to say something to that effect about Steve Harvey, because he is on his what…fourth wife? And if you’ve heard what some of the previous wives have said, he didn’t dump them like a kind person would (the way he likes people to think that he is). He generally was onto his next wife before he told the current one. I don’t know him personally, but we all should consider the source.
 

I just saw this. 

He's been married 3 times, so he has 2 ex's.  He broke up with his first wife to pursue his dream of being a comedian, which clearly worked out pretty well.  No other woman involved. 

His second ex was was admonished by the Judge for providing false information to the court, such as claiming she was penniless, homeless and could not afford an attorney when in fact Steve was paying her $40,000.00 a month in support and had given her 3 homes.  It got so bad and she got so crazy, at one point making a series of youtube videos after a gag order was issued that the judge eventually jailed her in contempt of court.  Last year she sued him for "torture, kidnapping and murder (she claims he murdered her soul)" among other things.  Consider that source.  CAF. 

Some people don't learn anything from past experiences.  I listen to his radio show a lot and he's a very smart man and he gives good relationship advice.  He thinks women should set the bar high.  I agree.

 

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