Metaphysical, Spiritual and Psychic Discussions > Keen.com

Frustrations with a trusted reader

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SunshineChick22:
There is a reader I've been speaking to for about a year and a half now about my current relationship. We are together, just an abnormal relationship due to health concerns that need to be navigated from time to time.

Have any of you gone to a trusted reader for a length period of time - but then be ridiculed for decisions that you make? We are together, that means communication, seeing each other, etc is there. Today in my reading with her she made conflicting statements. I asked her several questions after that to understand what she was saying and she became combative. Then she ridicules me for conversations I have with my boyfriend - what I say to him, when I say, etc. finally I just now sent her an email and let her know it was unappreciated - that we are in a relationship and I should feel free to have conversations with my SO without having to run every conversation by her or being made to feel like I'm doing the wrong things.

Has anyone ever had this experience before? Completely turned me off from even wanting updated readings for awhile :/ afraid it's going to start making me over think and cause issues in my relationship that aren't there.

FaithnTrust:
It sounds like she/he feels too comfortable with you and your no longer getting a reading - your getting a "friend"'s (and I say that lightly) advise who is annoyed with you for some reason. Be careful with this one!

HornetKick:
That’s why many of us have more than one reader and we look and look and look for good ones as backups. When you read a lot (as long as you have with one) they begin to feel entitled to give advice and that they know your situation better than you. Readers can never be flat out unbiased and just tell us what they see for no matter how long we choose to use them.

I get very frustrated when readers give me their side of the situation based on my situation as if what worked for them will work for me.  Just give me a psychic reading. Why is this so difficult to comprehend? Sometimes readers can be so tiring.

I went to one person once for two, three years and she was just as wrong as much as she was right. I don’t recall being admonished though, although once she gave me an extremely negative reading whereas nothing in it was for my benefit, I still read with her. It made me depressed though for a week. I figured out on my own she was horrible with relationship readings, but sometimes listening to her saved me heartache. I was going to loan a boyfriend once 5k and she told me not to do it. She said that in the beginning it will seem all rosey after he got the money but as time went on and he never made any moves to pay me back, I’d start to complain about it and he would jump ship. SO EFFING glad I listened to her on that one. Once I didn’t listen and loaned a friend $1500 for a business venture and never got a penny back and she had warned me not to.

Many things she said didn’t pan out, but when she was good, it was great. I finally stopped going to her and spending gobfuls of money when her advice was just not in line with what I wanted and her readings no longer made me feel as if they were for my higher good.

SunshineChick22:

--- Quote from: HornetKick on March 08, 2017, 04:18:40 PM ---That’s why many of us have more than one reader and we look and look and look for good ones as backups. When you read a lot (as long as you have with one) they begin to feel entitled to give advice and that they know your situation better than you. Readers can never be flat out unbiased and just tell us what they see for no matter how long we choose to use them.

I get very frustrated when readers give me their side of the situation based on my situation as if what worked for them will work for me.  Just give me a psychic reading. Why is this so difficult to comprehend? Sometimes readers can be so tiring.

I went to one person once for two, three years and she was just as wrong as much as she was right. I don’t recall being admonished though, although once she gave me an extremely negative reading whereas nothing in it was for my benefit, I still read with her. It made me depressed though for a week. I figured out on my own she was horrible with relationship readings, but sometimes listening to her saved me heartache. I was going to loan a boyfriend once 5k and she told me not to do it. She said that in the beginning it will seem all rosey after he got the money but as time went on and he never made any moves to pay me back, I’d start to complain about it and he would jump ship. SO EFFING glad I listened to her on that one. Once I didn’t listen and loaned a friend $1500 for a business venture and never got a penny back and she had warned me not to.

Many things she said didn’t pan out, but when she was good, it was great. I finally stopped going to her and spending gobfuls of money when her advice was just not in line with what I wanted and her readings no longer made me feel as if they were for my higher good.

--- End quote ---

I have three others that I go to for backups - but I go to her when the others aren't on (they're not on a lot) or I have a specific question about career or health or something.  My SO and I are great, no relationship problems and all, but there are issues that are beyond our control that sometimes can cause setbacks.  What I don't like is being told that I can't have normal conversations with a person I'm in a relationship with without running everything by them, etc.  It wasn't a negative reading (she has said "negative" things before - but nothing bad bad or anything like that), it was just the way it made me feel that I'm a screw up or something.  She even said I should keep conversation to text only and short at that - um, what?  I politely explained to her why I don't feel that's how relationships work, she didn't like what I said and it went downhill from there. 

It left me questioning the entire situation because she said two different things and nervous about anything I do now.  That's what I didn't like about it.  It's just a hard decision to decide if I should continue calling her because she has been correct about pretty much everything, but now it makes me question having readings when it now makes me doubt every move I make after being ridiculed.  Kind of like.... causing problems that weren't there to begin with?

esthere2017:
I find a lot of readers tend to interject fairly traditional and ingrained misogynistic views onto their advice when it comes to dating. For example, shaming you when you made the first move or when you called a man you liked after a great date. They all tend to favour the bullshit old standard of always waiting for a man to make the first move and dictate the outcomes. A long time ago Queen of Cups (who I can't stand by the way, do not recommend and will never call again) chastised me when I asked about two different men in my past by attempting to shame me for having multiple men in my life. That sort of nonsense. We pay a lot of money to call these kooks, it should make you feel good. If she is making you feel frustrated or upset find somebody else.

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