Relationship Psychology Discussions > My Story
volleying between faith and predictions
Bark angel:
Are there really psychics out there that will offer such advice in the face of really adverse situations for the caller? Or is it more a case that the psychics offer that sort of advice BECAUSE the caller either does not have the strength to stand up to a situation at a particular time or is not ready to face whatever consequences there might be?
--- Quote from: hope4love on November 12, 2013, 04:08:10 AM ---We have all been there, myself included. It annoys me when readers tell callers to be 'patient' and 'rock the boat' when in fact, that is the very thing we must to do in order for things to move forward as they should.
This gives the love interest a clear message that we will not tolerate being treated with disrespect and we deserve better than bread crumbs.
Our intuition will never steer us wrong and it usually trumps the psychics.
Kudos to you for listening to your gut and putting yourself first.
--- End quote ---
bstalling:
To your first question, yes a lot of psychics will give this advice to their callers. They will repeatedly tell them not to "rock the boat" and basically wait until he is ready to come back around and give you crumbs. To your later question, even if they sense that they are not ready to stand up to the situation, it is still very poor advice to give someone. If it is their intention to protect them from a situation that they may not be ready for (ex:the guy running away for good)...they should tell them why it is important to have clear boundaries, not tell them to avoid speaking up at all and let the person do whatever. That is called putting yourself first...and I think a lot of people on this board have problems with doing that. Once I got smart about this poor advice, I began speaking up for myself and putting everything out on the table...whether the other party wants to hear it or not. It trains them to be better people. Was their reaction always good? NO. But I sent a clear message that they won't be treating me poorly again, no matter how "confused" they are. So no, we can't just meet up for coffee and a casual chat. You will court me like a lady and show me you think of me highly in a romantic sense. No, you can't pop in and out of my life. You are either in or out.
I think I posted this before, but never have I been in a situation where waiting it out, accepting casual coffee dates, and being patient when the other party is misbehaving...never has that advice worked out in my favor. It reinforces the dysfunctional pattern and lets the other person know that you will stick around no matter what.
allbitenobark:
I wish we could "like" posts, lol. This is fantastic and so so true my dear!!
--- Quote from: bstalling on November 13, 2013, 02:01:41 AM ---To your first question, yes a lot of psychics will give this advice to their callers. They will repeatedly tell them not to "rock the boat" and basically wait until he is ready to come back around and give you crumbs. To your later question, even if they sense that they are not ready to stand up to the situation, it is still very poor advice to give someone. If it is their intention to protect them from a situation that they may not be ready for (ex:the guy running away for good)...they should tell them why it is important to have clear boundaries, not tell them to avoid speaking up at all and let the person do whatever. That is called putting yourself first...and I think a lot of people on this board have problems with doing that. Once I got smart about this poor advice, I began speaking up for myself and putting everything out on the table...whether the other party wants to hear it or not. It trains them to be better people. Was their reaction always good? NO. But I sent a clear message that they won't be treating me poorly again, no matter how "confused" they are. So no, we can't just meet up for coffee and a casual chat. You will court me like a lady and show me you think of me highly in a romantic sense. No, you can't pop in and out of my life. You are either in or out.
I think I posted this before, but never have I been in a situation where waiting it out, accepting casual coffee dates, and being patient when the other party is misbehaving...never has that advice worked out in my favor. It reinforces the dysfunctional pattern and lets the other person know that you will stick around no matter what.
--- End quote ---
nikkii:
I agree, good way to put it decibel. Bstalling, I loved your post!
Bark angel:
Guess I haven't read with those psychics then. All the readers I speak with are clear on one point - one should not adjust one's behavior for another person. Just "live your life and when the Universe feels you are both ready you'll be placed in each other's path".
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